Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

i dnt spank my 3yr old .. but i do after 5 plus times of saying no. pull his ear in a firm way and u need to listen

it does sometimes work.. this only happens after many many many several attempt to get him to listen. timeouts in the corner. my requests from him.. are limited.. I DO GET HE IS ONLY 3.. i try to pick my battles.. dont touch the hot stove... dont run in the street.. do nt hit; sit down in the grocery cart.. these are the ones that i keep important...is pulling on the ear cruel>?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:33 AM on Nov. 10, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (21)
  • It's better than spanking, if you're in a public place, IMO. You can do damage if you grab it wrong, and it does hurt, and turns beet red, but I don't think it's cruel. I do it too - though I do spank too when I need to.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • parents handle things in their own way, as long as you dont ever punish him when you are angry, then i feel its fine.. although my opinion doesnt mean much, i think that pulling his ear is a good change to spanking children... i have actually read that a study is showing that spanking children creates a void in the bond of your relationship with your child.. not sure about pulling ear, but if it works, and your not hurting him excessively(a lil is understandable) then i say props to you!!!
    AhmanisSoldier

    Answer by AhmanisSoldier at 12:46 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • yes when my kids where little they new all i had to do was stand up and they would stop their fighting ,they would stop just to see what i would do with out saying a word i would move the kids around that where fighting with the toy and place toy some where else, and they all had time out , your 3yr needs to now that pulling his ear is not good so try something different ,explain why the stove is hot ,why he has to sit in the cart if you tell he can hurt himself ,
    dutchcanadain

    Answer by dutchcanadain at 12:59 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • Do what works for you as a mother and gets through to your child. Lots of people are afraid to parent in public, for fear of being labled an "abuser." If you and your partner are consistent in your methods and reasonable with your discipline, your kids will turn out great. Kudos for your concerns, but trust your instincts!
    GoodyBrook

    Answer by GoodyBrook at 1:08 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • I don't think pulling his ear is a good idea, as you could damage him, not meaning to. Ask your doctor. This age can be very frustrating. Sometimes it doesn't seem like it's working, but just be consistent. It takes awhile for them to learn the limits.
    SweetLuci

    Answer by SweetLuci at 1:25 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • I'd be afraid of damaging his ear. Ears are sensitive. I know you are trying to make him mind, but damn that hurts.Can't you pull a piece of his hair maybe by his ear.

    Shines3

    Answer by Shines3 at 1:40 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • "i try to pick my battles.. dont touch the hot stove... dont run in the street.. do nt hit"


    ok..sooooo your trying to teach him not to hit...but yet you spank him??? how does that work?? so what happens when he goes to preschool..one of the other kids there piss him off, hes gonna go pull their ears?? thats not cool either!! i cant really give you any advice on what to do..because i dont know what hes doing to misbehave..

    alexis_06

    Answer by alexis_06 at 1:51 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • I DNT spank.. and i do need to be very careful abt damage to the ear.... i think we have done this im try to show him.. look here son. i let u get away with ALOT.,. AND NOW U HAVE pushed me to far.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:58 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • i pull the ear.. to illustrate.. u need to listen with Your Ears..... i knw its not nice.. bc the few times i have done it.. he told my dh mommy wasnt nice to my ear. i wasnt listening.// first thing when husband walked through the door. ill be honest.. i was embarrased and felt bad.. but i feel he needs me to be phyiscal; in some way.. and i dnt want to spank.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:03 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • My dad smacked my sister in the ear ONCE. Now her ears are super sensitive. If you just touch her ear it brings tears to her eyes. That's just one smack, how many pulls would it take to get your sons like that. He could get cauliflower ears. Those are big fat bumpy ears that have cartilage damage. You see HS boys with them that wrestled without head gear on, back in the day from being put in head locks and stuff. Find a different way.

    Shines3

    Answer by Shines3 at 2:30 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.