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2 Bumps

Help...

My almost 15 year old was sexually assaulted by her best friend about two weeks ago. She told me the night it happened; the next day we contacted the police, went to the hospital....did all this thing we are supposed to do.

Then, less then a week later I was checking her activity on her phone (to see if he has contacted her) to find that she was talking to him. When I confront her on it, she tells me that she believes he wont do it again, and that she doesn't want to lose him as a friend.

I've talked with sexual assualt people, and they say its pretty normal...I don't know what to do. My heart literally hurts right now. I am her aunt, and legal guardian, I've had her for almost 9 years. I feel like I am watching her stand on a cliff....

I can't force her to get help. I need some words of advice...some help. I don't want to lose her trust, but as a parent I want to protect her...

Answer Question
 
mommyaunt412

Asked by mommyaunt412 at 1:06 AM on Nov. 10, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • I don't want to upset you and you don't have to answer if you don't want to, but what did he do?
    nowmommyof2

    Answer by nowmommyof2 at 1:14 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • "sexually assaulted" can have different meaning to different people. Who chose to use those words to describe the incident, you or her?
    truthteller0722

    Answer by truthteller0722 at 1:17 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • Well...when she first told me, she said that they were in her room talking (which is something they did allot, they have been friends for almost two years). He started to make a move on her, when she said "No, I have a boyfriend, this isn't right" he became more aggressive. She said he pinned her down on the bed and wouldn't let her up. He managed to get her clothes off and was touching her. She said her arms were sore from trying to push him off. Then the next day she admitted that he forced his hand "inside her". And he tried to get his penis in her, but somehow she got out from under him. She told him to leave, because I was going to be home from work soon.

    When she first recalled the incident she was shaking and crying. She was uncomfortable, but now...

    I am so confused.
    mommyaunt412

    Comment by mommyaunt412 (original poster) at 1:25 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • I know you don't want to hear this, but if she still wants to be friends with him after that you might not have got the whole truth from her.
    nowmommyof2

    Answer by nowmommyof2 at 1:29 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • maybe. i just dont know what to do. why would she make that up? how do i comfort her on that?
    mommyaunt412

    Comment by mommyaunt412 (original poster) at 1:44 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • I don't know, I would talk with her more and PRAY ALOT!
    nowmommyof2

    Answer by nowmommyof2 at 1:53 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • I agree that there is more to the story that she is telling you, she might have hidden emotional feelings for this guy and does not want to hurt him for this reason.
    older

    Answer by older at 8:07 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • Go to the school and tell them what happend. Since they will be very interested to make sure it won't happen while they are at school, they will be very likely to keep a close eye on things. I guess this is assuming that they go to school together.
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 8:35 AM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • I would have killed him with my bare hands. I would call the phone company and block that number from her phone. However I am a total helicopter mom. That is very serious.
    canthaveboys1

    Answer by canthaveboys1 at 12:14 PM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • im 16 and ive been sexually assulted twice by my best friend who is also an ex. ive known him for almost 5yrs. she most likely has feeling this guy and dont want to hurt him if she believes he wont do it again. the 1st time with my friend i thought he knows i dont wanna go there maybe he wont do it again, i dont want him get arrested. second time(Yesterday) i was done. if he cant take no for answer he isnt a guy i wanna be around. she just needs to realize that herself.
    shan02

    Answer by shan02 at 1:34 PM on Nov. 10, 2010

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