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:( Help

My husband and I used to go out friday-sunday ALL day just doing stuff together. movies, fishing walking in the park...ANYTHING....And come home and watch tv make dinner together. It was cute. We were so happy together. It was like the perfect relationship. I don't know what happened. Now he sleeps all the time, we dont spend alot of time together anymore. He always wants to drink and we argue so much to the point i want to give up. Not to mention no sex. Last night we had a talk and everything was good again! And ... a good night too ;) but again its almost 2 and he is stil in bed and doesnt want to get up today and back to the same old thing. Anyone have advice? I just dont know what to do

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ReadyToRage

Asked by ReadyToRage at 2:41 PM on Nov. 2, 2008 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • You should sit him down and talk to him.
    Ask him whats goin on, why are things different now.
    Best of luck love!
    Nellie1986

    Answer by Nellie1986 at 2:43 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • continued....
    He says that he loves me to death and all this crap but what can I say that will make him realize the way he is treating me. It's gotten so bad that even my mom who once thought he was gods gift to the world is making comments about us spliting up and that I need to be treated better.
    Friday to now, he has been sleeping all but maybe 8 hours. And thats including halloween when we took our son trick or treating. I just dont know whats going on. Anyone have this problem before?
    ReadyToRage

    Answer by ReadyToRage at 2:44 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • Is he depressed? Maybe he needs to see a doctor for an evaluation.
    Teachermom01

    Answer by Teachermom01 at 2:50 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • He sounds like he's depressed. I would talk to him and do some research on helping loved ones that are depressed. there is tons of info out there. Have heart, it doesn't mean he's not happy with you or thathe doesn't love you anymore, he just has some things to work through.
    nwdeserangel

    Answer by nwdeserangel at 2:54 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • I agree with Nwd.. he sounds depressed. You're making this about you - but I think you're missing his symptoms. Drinking, sleeping a lot, lack of sex drive.. lethargy. It all sounds like depression. I would gently talk to him, not about how he isn't meeting your needs, but that you're worried that he seems depressed. Ask him how he's feeling, if something is stressing him out, talk about options - counseling, maybe getting a physical to make sure he's okay.. mentioning his behavior to a doctor to see what they recommend..
    Serafyna

    Answer by Serafyna at 2:59 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • Somtimes things do change from that always doing things together to just staying home so don't freak out. If he makes excuses about having sex with you then I would worry. My husband and I used to go out all the time and now we both enjoy staying home and doing just nothing. When we do go out, we get so tired that we need the next day to relax. Just try talking to him but don't nag because it will only make things worse.
    nora17

    Answer by nora17 at 3:02 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • Well I would suggest your husband go in for a physical to make sure that everything is fine healthwise. He could have a mineral or vitamin deficiency, or something else going on. Maybe he is under alot of stress and that is bothering him or he could be depressed. I would also suggest he go and see a mental health counselor too. I hope that he feels better soon.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:07 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • Do the kid(s) play into the picture?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:19 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • PAY ATTENTION to how sneaky alcohol can be, is he becoming an alcoholic? Hug over? Sleeping until two is not normal and should be addressed. Alcohol can change everything about a person, their motivation, their mood, their work, their sleep patterns - EVERYTHING. Stay in tune with his habits, and seek help right away if you think there is a problem. Alcohol can ruin a family slowly, break it into pieces. Good luck!
    Tirzah6

    Answer by Tirzah6 at 5:08 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • thanks girls =)
    I think he is depressed. I really want to have him go see someone but I don't know how he will tak it.
    He works at night and watches our 2 year old durring the day so I could see how he is stressed but he wasnt like this even 3 weeks ago and he was doing the same thing. My friend is going to start watching our son starting this week so maybe that will help out a little in his moods.
    Anytime I talk to him about his drinking he makes it seem like I am calling him a loser or something and I am not, at all trying to say that I just think it needs to stop
    ReadyToRage

    Answer by ReadyToRage at 6:12 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

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