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do you ever feel clueless as a parent?

I am totally clueless. My twins are 9 and one of them is killing me!!!she is mean and hateful sometimes and throws fits like a toddler. I hang in there and don't give her her way but man why does she have to be so bad? I have always been good to them, given them what they need, some of what they want, loved them,etc and she is still bad. I am beginning to think she is crazy.


Asked by Anonymous at 11:57 AM on Nov. 10, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • I'll tell you that particular age is hard! (and you have a double dose of it!) It sounds like you are doing what you should by not giving in to her. You might want to make sure you aren't showing any favoritism towards the one that is behaving. I know that's hard. Try not to say anything that shows you are comparing their behavior or it might be part of what is making the one act out.

    I'm speaking from my experience with boys.. who knows about girls.. maybe she is just crazy! Hang in there. Remember to act not re-act. That is the hard part when they are pushing your buttons.

    Answer by Jambo4 at 12:17 PM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • oh honey remember how lost you were they were born you figured it out. you'll get through take her to dr have her tested personality disorders don't show till early teens maybe counseling or meds.pls keep in touch if you need anyt

    Answer by raisingmen at 12:13 PM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • Children aren't born with instruction manuals. Parenting is an on-the-job training course.

    Answer by plclemo at 4:00 PM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • sometimes I do. but hang in there.

    Answer by cuteness13983 at 7:26 PM on Nov. 10, 2010

  • Well I would say she has puberty and her hormones are starting to come online. Children mature so much sooner than they did. And just because they're twins doesn't mean that they will react to same entering puberty. Just remember to talk to her and not at her and listen to her when she talks to you. Let her know that you really listen to what she has to say. Just remember what you were like at that age and what your parents did.

    Answer by depressedmom65 at 8:59 AM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • My daughter just turned 10. Whenever I asked her to do something, like pick some of her stuff up or clean her room, she says yes and then just proceeds to ignore my request. This happens repeatedly. Then I get pissed and tell her to do it, and she throws what we call a hissy fit. She's been like this since she was born. I am terrified of what she will be like as an actual teen. I have also tried taking privileges away, tried talking to her and explaining why she needs to do certain things, nothing much seems to work. But when they really want to visit a friend or have a friend over, that is usually when stuff finally gets done. I know this definitely works with my 11 1/2 yr old son. Just try to hang in there, I know it is hard, there are days I wonder why I did this. Sometimes I think they think it is there job to torment us.

    Answer by terriella at 10:15 PM on Nov. 13, 2010