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Any advice or words of encouragement?

I am depressed, stressed, and unhappy. My marriage seems to be falling apart. My husband is never home. He works 16 hour days Dawson pushes every button I have and it’s a daily battle with him each and every day. This house is always a mess. No matter how much I clean it doesn’t seem to get any better. My life feels like it is falling apart. I feel like I am alone in raising our children. I feel like I have a roommate not a husband. I don’t even have a desire for intimacy because he comes home smelling of hogs and doesn’t have the energy to take a shower. How do I get back to the life I once loved so much?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:35 PM on Nov. 2, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • You two definately need a vacation. Tell him not ask, that you need him to take some time off because of the way you're feeling. I get that feeling sometimes too when husband and I are overworked...it feels like we're just coming and going sometimes. But the routine has to break so it doesn't toll so much on you.
    Apr1l

    Answer by Apr1l at 4:55 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • I have a GREAT book I'd love to suggest.... however it's written by a Christian and rubs a lot of women the wrong way. If you'd like to know the title, and read an excerpt, you can message me =)
    dedicatedrider

    Answer by dedicatedrider at 4:55 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • It sounds like you should start by getting control of your home and your child. No wonder you are depressed. Little children should never be allowed to terrorize their parents or to wreck your house. Maybe you could start by putting the toys where only you can access them. Allow only one or two out at a time. Also, try thinking positvely about the fact that your husband has a job, works hard to provide for you, and that he will not always have to work 16 hour days. It is so true that our emotions follow our thinking. Once we begin to think more postively, our feelings will usually follow the more positive line. We just have a tendency to see more negative. It's kind of like the law of gravity.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 5:04 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • Think about the "life I once loved so much". What was it about that life that you loved? Is there something about it you can recreate or go back to? Your life is one all too common but the good news is, it can be better. It takes about four days to get the hog smell out of the pores! Get away or send Dawson away for a few days or one day if that's all you can get. Reconnect with your husband any way you can. Find some time and space for yourself too. Take one thing at a time that comes to you about the life you want and find some time to read about it, talk about it. Any friends in the picture? You need to have some friends to share the ups and downs of life and to have fun with. Fun...remember that? I feel for ya girl. Been there, done that.
    manna1qd

    Answer by manna1qd at 5:46 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • you should read the book "How to get what you want, and want what you have" It is a great book and really helps you feel better about yourself. When we ar enot happy with ourselves sometimes, we find reasons not to be happy in our marriage. Find out what makes you happy first..working on that will do wonders for you..then move on to how your husband makes you feel.
    nora17

    Answer by nora17 at 5:51 PM on Nov. 2, 2008

  • First off a womens home is her castle.Not a mans.Get up an clean it get rid of stuff you dont need.I to am a stay home mom that my mate works lots of hours.At times I feel I am raising our children alone.WE HAD 9 We have three left at home now.Give him a reason to clean up.To wonder how your day was.Fix your self up.Volunteer at the school.GO on the field trips get involued in your church.DONT SIT THERE WAITING ON HIM TO COME HOME>let him come home an you are gone.But be where its a good thing.Dont go hunting trouble.BUT GET his attention.An he will want to clean up.
    fearful5

    Answer by fearful5 at 8:16 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

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