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How can I help the way I feel about my husbands ex-wife?

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate the woman, I am just a tad bit jealous about how my husband treats her at times. They have a teen together. Said child is an amazing person that i love/ help guide, and she calls me mom (not to my face but to dad and close friends).

Anyways when we were both pregnant he would always ask her if she needed anything or wanted anything for her baby but didn't do the same for me. When we would go pick up their oldest he would bring her things here and there that wanted to eat from a restaraunt that is only in our part of town. When it was her birthday he asked if she wanted anything, yet when its our birthday (we share the same day) I don't get asked... ever (i like being surprised but lately there are not enough funds so i havent minded not recieving it's just the not asking part that bothers me)

She is a beautiful older woman and I do respect her... can someone give me advice on how to cope


Asked by MakG at 8:02 AM on Nov. 11, 2010 in Relationships

Level 10 (456 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • You need to tell him all you told us here.

    I would be FLIPPING out if i were you. Maybe for some weird reason he is trying to impress her & wants to rub it in that he has a good life & does nice things for people. I know that when my DH's ex girlfriend comes to town he FREAKS out cleaning the house & it always hurt me because he never cleans THAT good just for me. But, i put myself in his shoes & i'd probably do the same if it was my ex that was coming over, i would also want my ex to think that my life rocks & that i am happy & have a bitchin house.

    Have you asked him personally why he does these things for her & not you?

    Answer by samurai_chica at 8:43 AM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • That is very tough. You have to feel secure in your relationship first and the jealousy will go away. I can't help but get the feeling though that he might still care about her too. Who initiated the divorce?

    Answer by Shanna84 at 8:09 AM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • That one is arguable... it's sort of a he said she said type of thing... you wouldn't know unless you were there

    Comment by MakG (original poster) at 8:16 AM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • I'm sorry but the treatment you are enduring is just terrible imo!
    He should be treating YOU the way he is treating her!
    I would calmly ask him if the old hypothetical shoe was on the other foot, than how would he feel??
    You DESERVE better treatment then this <3

    Answer by Missikat75 at 8:31 AM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • thank you, i have and he's told me he has no feeling for her and that's why they aren't together (blah blah blah) and he wouldn't be able to handle jealousy better than me o_O sometimes guys are worse about that

    Comment by MakG (original poster) at 8:38 AM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • yes...guys ARE worse when it comes to jealousy! I put up with my DH's ex but he would NEVER EVER put up with hanging with my ex.....not fare at all......Women are just so much more mature!

    Answer by samurai_chica at 8:44 AM on Nov. 11, 2010