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is your hubby affectionate? how does he show you affection and how does he like affection in return? adult content

mine is not very affectionate. he's not a jerk but i dont think he came from a family of many hugs and kisses. its weird because my mom was always hugging and kissing me and i was never comfortable being affectionate with family but with him and my kids im always stealing affection.

his way of showing me affection is well.. in the bedroom lol. rarely does he just come up to me for a hug, although he does kiss me and the kids upon leaving and returning from work.

his favorite way of getting affection, he wants his head rubbed. he asks for it every night!


Asked by tnm786 at 12:25 PM on Nov. 11, 2010 in Relationships

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Answers (11)
  • I say just tell him.."I am a girl, and i need my hugs and kisses!" ha! but seriously. I came from the family without kisses and hugs and my bouyfriend, his mom tells him i love you everytime he leaves, even if its to go to the gas station and back. They are very affectionate and I was really not used to it, no one in my family has ever said I love you to one another? But if the only way he shows affection is in the bedroom you should slow things down! Dont just jump right into it, make him kiss you and hug you and blah blah blah, make him understand that its not gonna be so easy for him, he needs to give you what you want to get what he wants. Just make it really romantic, candles, laungerie, ext. just make it special, and he will go along...then the next day slap him on the butt or something else little but after the good night, start the affection and just make it a normal everyday thing!

    Answer by Becca-Jo at 12:34 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • Mine is extremely affectionate, he is a huger and a kisser, anywhere anytime, I go to sleep every night (for 38 years) while he scratches my head until I fall asleep. I was not an affectionate person until I met him, now I am a huger and a kisser too, and I love being able to do this, although sometimes hubby gets too intense with the affection and I say, enough!

    Answer by older at 12:35 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • There is no one more affectionate than my Husband..I could go on for days about how He shows - and tells! - me and Our Son how much He loves Us. He is the most loving and wonderful Man Son and I are beyond blessed.

    Answer by -AJ at 12:57 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • LOL... that reminded me. I love having my hair played with. It's very soothing. My hubby plays with my hair when he is indicating he wants sex.. We get mixed signals.. I get sleepier and he wonders why it's not

    Answer by Jambo4 at 12:28 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • We are both very affectionate. There is lots of kissing, hugging, cuddling, and "I love yous" in our house.

    we both agree that foreplay starts long before you make it to the bedroom. It's how you treat each other throughout the day that gets us in the mood.

    My XH was similar to your DH. he wasn't affectionate unless he wanted sex or if he thought that I was ready to leave him, then he would turn on the charm thru the day (I call it his representative). But, once he was comfortable that I wasn't going anywhere or if I made him mad about something, he would revoke his affection.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 12:30 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • DH is VERY affectionate! We have to be touching when we're on the couch & we hug & kiss throughout the day. Sometimes a big ole hug feels GREAT after a long stressful day. I Love it when i'm cooking dinner & comes up behind me & puts his arms around me & kisses me. He makes me feel appreciated ALWAYS!

    Answer by samurai_chica at 12:34 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • My ex-husband only touched me when he wanted sex. That was the extent of our his ability to be affectionate, and it was debilitating in our relationship.

    My SO is extremely affectionate. We give hugs and kisses, snuggle, lay around and give massages, bathe each other, etc. we sleep like a pile of kittens most nights... and I really love grooming him (especially doing his nails- he is so hard on them!), and he loves it too. We're fairly physical with our affection.

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 12:40 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • My husband is more the stoic type. However, he does try to be affectionate even though it doesn't come easily to him. He knows it cost him his first marriage because his ex wife was very needy and needed constant reassurance (funny how they got together since they were so different). She had one emotional affair early in their marriage and then another full on affair later and left him. I came from a family that wasn't real touchy feely. But I am much more affectionate. However, my husband is similar to my family in that way so it doesn't bother me and I show him affection all the time which he will return. I'll grab his hand when we walk, snuggle him when we watch TV, spoon him in bed, give him hugs from time to time for no reason. He actually loves that. He just isn't a big initiator but he's doing it more and more.

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 12:43 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • omg, i love having my hair played with too! and it does make me sleepy also lol

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 12:29 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • lol @becca-jo thanks for the advice =)

    when we were newlyweds last year (coming up on our two year in april 2011) he showed affection alot more than he does now. he used to do what samurai_chica said, come up behind me while cooking and put his arms around me. it was so nice =) now when i want sex i have to initiate everything! i think stress plays a big role in why he's less affectionate now and also from him not used to being hugged and kissed on all the time.

    Comment by tnm786 (original poster) at 12:37 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

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