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Hi, my question is, what to do to my son who is 18 and has returned from Army bootcamp 2 days ago and he has not called me or came home ?

he is my only son and i have no idea why he has not contacted me but he has called his friends and one of them picked him up and has been driving him around to see everyone but me. I am at a loss as to why.

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Asked by L.Makakoa at 11:40 PM on Nov. 11, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 4 (36 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • um, talk to him. Figure out what is going on!

    Answer by an-apple-a-day at 11:43 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • Did you have a good relationship with your son before he left? That is weird that he wouldn't come home. Did you go to his bootcamp graduation? I would try and get ahold of him somehow, maybe through his friends or whoever is telling you that his friends are driving him around.

    Answer by ILoveCade at 11:44 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • Tell his friend to drive him to your house. He can visit his friends later.

    Answer by beyondhopes at 11:47 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • Wow. I'm sorry?

    Answer by MELRN at 11:48 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • @Ilovecade, yes I do have a good relationship with my son. he has called several times and on his last call he said they were going to discharge him due to a medical condition they found, this was on the last day of his bootcamp which was in October 3 weeks ago, and I told him i was proud of him for making it that far and i will be glad to see him when he gets home which i thought was last week to tell the truth.

    Comment by L.Makakoa (original poster) at 11:53 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • I have also tried to facebook him and no answer

    Comment by L.Makakoa (original poster) at 11:55 PM on Nov. 11, 2010

  • he's having a hard time seems like to me my hubby was in the marine corp and boot camp jsut takes alot out of a person mentally but now that i read that he got discharged for a medical reason that does a number on a person. just give him time he needs some time to be on his own. give him a call but dont call him everyday i understand that he's your only child but just give him some time.

    Answer by Steph925 at 12:08 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • My husband has gone through 2 seperate boot camps and yes it does take a lot out of a person when they have gone through. But as soon as he was out he just wanted to be around family. It doesn't make sense that he would be ok seeing friends and other family as well (since you said to see everyone but you) but not his mother. Maybe he is upset about something else? Seeing as he called you from boot camp, my husband only got tops 2 phone calls per boot camp to call, so he obviously loves you if he was calling you on those chances. I would just keep trying to get ahold of him. Like a pp stated, try not to overwhelm him with calls, but he should know you are wanting to see him! I am sorry you are going through that, hopefully he is ok and maybe just sad and not ready to face you yet!

    Answer by ILoveCade at 12:27 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • You don't do anything TO him. He's an adult, he can do as he pleases. Don't get all overbearing, that will just push him farther away. He's been to boot camp - that changes most people. He's facing the reality now that he may get shipped overseas - he's doing what he has to do to cope with being an adult who may go over there for a year. He's got a lot on his mind & on his plate mama! Just let him know you're there, you'd like to see him, but you understand he needs his time. My brother did the same thing when he came home from boot camp, from AIT, on his R&R while he was in Iraq, and more than once after returning home for good. I know first hand that the more you urge him home or anything, the farther away from you he'll get.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:57 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • That must be killing you! BUT, perhaps he went through a real hard time & is having a hard time. If I were you, I would call him & ask him directly! Hope all goes well & he is, too!

    Answer by NicolesMommy at 1:19 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

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