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3 Bumps

adopting a foster child

we have been raising a little boy for almost 3 years as our own and did all the requirments that cps told us to do to get to him and then right when the biological parents rights got terminated he went up for adoption so we thought by cps we were going to get to adopt him but now after this long they say that he should be adopted by the people that has his siblings .but we even told them that we would do everything we could to keep him in contact with him sibling if we could adopt him but the cps says that all siblings have to be adopted by the same home but our kids and are he known for 3 years do u think we should have to give him to these other

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:30 AM on Nov. 12, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (8)
  • It would not make sense to me to take a child, who has been with a famly for 3 years, away just so he/she can live with siblings. Especially since, depending on your childs age, he does not even remember his siblings. It would be more harmful, in my opinion, to take him from his stable home to put him in a new environment just to be with siblings. That just seems bad to me.

    Answer by ILoveCade at 4:38 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • Have you spoken to a lawyer about this?
    What doesn't make sence to me is that you have had this little boy for 3 yrs and know that he can be adopted why did they split the children up in the first place?

    Answer by raemommy at 4:45 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • Why didn't they place the children together when whatever happened in the first place happened? I would speak with a lawyer and really look more into this. I have a friend that takes foster children in and yes i believe every state is different, but if the children were gonna be up for adoption then they should have place the children in a home all together. I would think they would look at the fact that this child has been with your family for 3 years and they would want to be looking out for what is best for the child. GL with this i hope all works for the best for your family and this child.

    Answer by raemommy at 4:55 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • me and all my brothers grew up in different homes and we turned out fine, its sad that this is happening to you and him, i dont know why they would take him away from the first loving home he's been in and the people who have made him family all this time to just give him to someone else, you should get a lawyer

    Answer by ArianasMama2007 at 5:05 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • I think that this happens quite often and I don't know if you can do anything about it. We had a family at a daycare where I worked who had a little girl for three years. Mom finally gave up her rights. The family thought they were going to be able to adopt her. A aunt and uncle from another state stepped up and said they wanted her and off she went. I haven't seen the family in a couple of years (this happened about 8 years ago) but her aunt and uncle did let her come and stay weekends with the family and over the summer she would come for a couple of weeks. Maybe if you have to let him go you could work out something like that?

    Answer by JamieLK at 5:31 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • This is so sad for all of you. I don't know anything about the cps or the laws but I would suggest that you talk to someone who does..It is so sad to take a child from his family..if you were goog enough to foster him without his sibs then why aren't you good enough to adopt him now...Certainly there must be a way for you to keep him and have an arrangment to visit and be active in the lives of his sibs..Is he old enough to ask him what he wants...I didn't see and age...I will keep you in our prayers...

    Answer by motherganey5 at 9:31 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • it is possible that they will take him. It doesnt seem right and maybe it isnt but it happens.

    Answer by imuney at 9:58 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • I think in any event they should always keep sibs together when the can. Bless you for your foster work, but could you take the other boy as well?

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:58 AM on Nov. 12, 2010

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