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What do YOU think I could/should do to be more attractive for my husband??

I'm not fishing for compliments, I'm being serious. When we were first together he used to touch me all over and tell me how hot I was. Now... not so much. Now he hugs me and tells me I'm a "cutie patootie". WTF? I want him to stop and stare at me like he used to. I don't want any "Oh you don't need to do anything, you're fine the way you are." responses. I want honest feedback even if it hurts my feelings. I have a lot of pictures on my profile. Please take the time to look at them and give me some feedback. Thanks!!! And as a thought, his hottest most favorite celebs are Liv Tyler and Shannon Doherty.

 
MarlyeGirl

Asked by MarlyeGirl at 1:52 AM on Nov. 3, 2008 in Beauty & Style

Level 2 (5 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • I honestly think its probably pregnancy and seeing your more as a mother right now...maybe that would explain the dress issue he had the other day too. Mine isn't shy about telling me he doesn't find pregnancy attractive (even though he should lie)! To be honest, I don't either...I feel like a fat blob while I'm pregnant and my legs are completely swollen now...its definitely a chore to even get to "cute" for me right now. How is your sex life right now? I honestly don't think you have anything to work on to be "hotter" but maybe if you ACT hotter and show him you're still a sexual person that could help (unless of course you're not wanting to right now which would be perfectly understandable too)
    kabbot01

    Answer by kabbot01 at 7:06 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • I KNOW this may sound harsh...but (here goes)...when I was pregnant with Ava, Alex would tell me all of the time how "cute" I was. When we got married and for the years leading up to my pregnancy he would CONSTANTLY love on me and tell me how beautiful I was and how lucky he was to have a woman as physically beautiful as me. During the pregnancy, he would still love on me and when I asked, he would say "of course you're still beautiful"....but I had to ASK first. After I had Ava and the belly went away, he went back to the same loving way that he was BEFORE pregnancy.

    AvasMommy810

    Answer by AvasMommy810 at 2:19 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • I never really understood it until one day when we were in the grocery store and he saw a VERY pregnant woman and said "wow she's huge...she looks like she swallowed a watermelon". I told him that was mean and told him that when I was pregnant he used to tell me that I looked beautiful pregnant. He then said "of course I said that...I LOVE you and I didn't want to hurt your feelings...you were still attractive, it was just hard to picture you as a sexual being while you were pregnant with our baby...it just seemed weird to think that my child's mother is sexy". He didn't mean it in a mean way. He was just trying to say that he started developing deeper feelings for me and he thought it was disrespectful to call his child's mother "hot" or "sexy".

    AvasMommy810

    Answer by AvasMommy810 at 2:20 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • I guess what I'm trying to say is that maybe he still finds you just as attractive, he just feels more deeply for you and has moved past the superficial beauty and onto the internal beauty. In other words, just because he doesn't SAY that he thinks you're "hot" doesn't mean that he doesn't think that you are the most gorgeous creature that he has ever seen. Your relationship is evolving and so are his feelings for you. Congratulations!

    AvasMommy810

    Answer by AvasMommy810 at 2:20 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • Well, you've got the hair! You are really cute, but maybe you could be sexier. Perhaps some dramatic makeup and\or provocative outfits. My experience has been that guys dig it when their women dress trashy just for them. They just don't know enough to realize how tacky it is! I guess it's kinda like how Alfred Hitchcock said that people like to feel afraid when they know they are safe. Well, guys like to see their s.o. as a whore as long as they are confident that she is not.
    knightmoves

    Answer by knightmoves at 2:29 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • My husband HATES the "trashy" look.

    AvasMommy810

    Answer by AvasMommy810 at 2:31 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • I dunno... I wore a dress yesterday that was an inch above my knees and he wanted me to change.....
    MarlyeGirl

    Answer by MarlyeGirl at 2:34 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • wow, I would have told my husband to fuck off. excuse the language, but I have a real problem with people trying to control me. so my husband knows better then to tell me to change my clothes. I think you are sexy pregnant or not. Some husbands my feel that if you look sexy or hot while pregnant it may make you look trashy to others. In all reality they just are afraid of some pregnant loving guy, will sweep you off your feet. Theirs alot of guys you find pregnant women hott!!!
    soonmommyof3

    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 4:38 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • He thinks I'm hot pregnant, but he thought my dress was too short. I guess I'm just too fat or whatever for it. He said he doesn't want anybody else seeing what's his. It wasn't an issue before.
    MarlyeGirl

    Answer by MarlyeGirl at 4:54 AM on Nov. 3, 2008

  • Looks wise? Nothing needed. And I know that's not the answer you want but it's an honest evaluation.

    At a certain point in a relationship, men do stop staring. Even supermodels find this happening. We get comfortable with each other. And truly, there's no better compliment than a man being that comfortable with you. it means you truly do have a soulmate.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 5:14 AM on Nov. 3, 2008