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5 Bumps

My feelings are so hurt - Should I give them a piece of my mind or not?

Seems I'm sick and getting sicker but my kids don't even care. I was diagnosed with Barrett's, and had to do endoscopy every 6 months; today I had another; dr did not have good news. In a year I've gone from a diagnosis of GERD, to GERD w/asthma & Barrett's & ulceration & stricture - And today the doctor added dysplasia, meaning that there's been a significant change in the Barrett's. For those who don't know Barrett's is a precancerous condition- explained to me like this: your body has put together everything it needs to declare cancer on you, in this case Adenocarcinoma (survival rate less than 20%). We were doing endoscopy every 6 months, today the dr announced the progression is severe enough that we have to start doing endo with biopsy every 6 weeks.
To say I'm scared out of my wits is an understatement but even knowing how serious all this is - neither of my kids even called today to see if I'm okay. That hurts.

Answer Question

Asked by ShelbyShareAlot at 4:43 PM on Nov. 12, 2010 in Relationships

Level 19 (7,281 Credits)
Answers (18)
  • I think maybe you should call them and say something. Maybe they just havent had it hit home yet. Im so terribly sorry your going through this, My thoughts and prayers are with you ((Hugs))

    Answer by JakesCupcake at 4:46 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • Don't it always seem as tho, you don't know what you've got til it's gone? They pave paradise and put up a parking lot.... Either your kids are in denial and don't want to know or they are scared and don't want to hear. Im sure they're very upset and don't want to upset youk by asking about it.

    Answer by Blabbermouth at 4:46 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • Yes. I am so sorry mama. I am glad you are getting treatment.
    My MIL told my hubbs that it hurt her feelings that he did not call on her BDAY and now he remembers and he is GLAD he remembers.

    Answer by 2tinyhineys at 4:47 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • Maybe they don't understand what it is exactly, so don't see what a big deal it is. Explain it to them.

    Answer by Zoeyis at 4:47 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • CM doesn't give enough space to put it all sometimes, huh....
    Yes, my kids know I'm sick. Yes, they knew I was having another endo today. Yes, they knew the doctor scheduled it early because he was concerned about the Barrett's progressing.

    I just feel like I might as well not tell them anything anymore. It "feels" like - if they don't even care enough to call to see if I'm okay when they know I'm on cancer watch, then I don't want their pity IF this continues to progress and I end up getting the bad word one day.

    It kinda feels like I'm "trying to get their sympathy" when they don't even ask how it went and then I call them up and say "well, blah blah blah".. I'm not a pity-me kinda person. But today, I'm having the "omg- why don't they even care" feelings.

    Comment by ShelbyShareAlot (original poster) at 4:48 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • How often do they call? You might ask if they could come over, they might be uncertain what to say or how.

    Answer by foxyldy at 4:49 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • Perhaps they've always seen their mother as a strong, confident woman, ready to accept any challenge. Maybe they don't even see this as a challenge for you... Call them and let them know that it is, and let them know what you need them to do. Say, "Will you call me tomorrow at noon?" or "Can you take me to my next Dr.'s appointment and hold my hand?" or "Will you water my plants while I'm away?"

    Once you tell them what you need from them, they'll be there for you.


    Answer by GoodyBrook at 4:50 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • I have a daughter, my oldest. If I had some termanal illness. She would not call either. She would not even come to visit.

    Answer by louise2 at 4:50 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • im so sorry :(

    Answer by pookipoo at 4:50 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • I think you should explain it to them so they can understand it.

    Answer by -AJ at 4:50 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

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