Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

how does it make you feel when your IL or parents give your child something you don't want them to have behind your back.

Answer Question

Asked by Lynnsae at 11:00 PM on Nov. 12, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 23 (17,150 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • You know how I feel about that LOL
    But yes, it upsets me.

    Answer by Mme.Langley at 11:02 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • Never been in that position. I would be very upset. Did they know you didn't want them to have it?

    Answer by arenad at 11:02 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • i go off the wall...its fine when im not there to tell them no first but if i say no and they do it anyway we usually leave their house.. MIL is very very bad about this

    Answer by 2boysmommy.js at 11:05 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • Well, my MIL will give my 17 month old a bottle when I'm not home and it irks me. My dumbass thinks I've thrown out all the bottles but yet they keep turning up from somewhere. I don't let it get me too upset or go off on her, I know she means well and she's such an excellent grandma, but it still grinds my gears.

    Answer by Nanixh at 11:10 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • It makes me so mad! If I have wishes for some reason or the other than they should all respect that! What gives them the right to do things I don't want?? My mom specifically knows how it feels, my grandma did it with me all my life and yet she still insists on doing things that bug... UGH!!! I just tell her, stop or loose your time.

    Answer by bjojola at 11:17 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • BTDT and ended up not seeing the ILs for two years until they learned to respect our wishes.

    Answer by mom2aspclboy at 11:22 PM on Nov. 12, 2010

  • I just answered your similar question, but I would take whatever it was away and tell my child "Aww. I'm sorry that ___ went and got your hopes up - maybe they didn't hear that Mommy just said no." or "Maybe ___ forgot that the rule is ____... can you remind them next time and say 'no thank you'?"

    I would be clear with my parents/in-laws about what I expect from them when they watch my children or when they're visiting with us. This is something I actually *have* done several times.

    Answer by DazzlednSeattle at 12:23 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • Never had to deal with it, but I'd be livid. If I say "no" to something, and my mama hears me tell the kids "no", she backs me up if the kids try to butter her up for something.

    Answer by HaydensMama07 at 12:25 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • actually i never had that problem with grandparents,,,but I have had that problem with aunts and uncles......

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 1:34 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • For me it depends on what it is. We don't live near any of our parents so we only see them a handful of times each year. If they give her too much candy for a couple of days, it's really not the end of the world. If we lived close, it would be a different story. Luckily, though, my in-laws and mom are pretty good about respecting our wishes. My dad, not as much, but my stepmom tries to keep him in check. Now if anyone had given her formula, I would have went off the deep end, but my family wouldn't do that anyway.

    Answer by Christina807 at 8:47 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.