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3 Bumps

What would you do if you're child's teachers are not helping in a good way?

My daughter is in the 1st grade and this year has been hell since it started. My daughter loves school but is now crying and begging me to not let her go and teach her at home. Very heart breaking especially for a child who gets straight A's. Well this past week has been horrible for us. Olivia has had 6 "wet" accidents at school all together and that's not normal at all. We've had her tested for a UTI, Diabetes and Yeast Infection and they all were negative. I have a parent/teacher/assistant principal conference on Monday but I know I'm going to have issues come Monday morning and her going to school. This past Monday the assistant teacher told Olivia that she needs to go back to kindergarten since she can't stay dry. And then on Tuesday put her in front of the cubbies, away from the children and not allowed to associate with them at all. How do you think that made me feel when I walked into the room. wwyd?

 
livysmom04

Asked by livysmom04 at 10:49 AM on Nov. 13, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 5 (87 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (30)
  • The assistant teacher did this? I'd be furious. It is not okay to speak to a student like that. I taught first and would have NEVER said something that negative. Your DD needs to feel comfortable telling the teacher when she needs to uise the bathroom, in a quiet mannar. Perhaps they can set up a signal to be used. Your DD is feeling uncomfortable about it, which is unfair to her.
    KairisMama

    Answer by KairisMama at 10:54 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • You need to say something...you need to write all of this down and take it into that conference with you. Something is wrong. You may need to talk to the principal and have her room switched. I'm sorry this is happening. This is so sad.
    MommyH2

    Answer by MommyH2 at 10:59 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • I already homeschool my kids and would definitely recommend it in this situation!!! Something bad is going on at school and it is only going to get worse. I'd pull her out yesterday and homeschool her. PM me if you want some suggestions on how to get started.
    Bethsunshine

    Answer by Bethsunshine at 11:51 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • Well, you are obviously doing the right thing by having a meeting with the teacher and assistant principal. I may even keep her home Monday if possible. It sounds like she is having some real problems. If it isn't anything medical maybe it is nerves and stress.
    ILoveCade

    Answer by ILoveCade at 10:55 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • But I've already decided that if either of my kids had problems in school with teasing, etc I would pull them and homeschool in a heartbeat.
    ____________________
    While I understand that urge, and agree that it is not a healthy atmosphere, this might not be the answer. I would attempt to teach them coping skills first, and address the issue with the school. There is bullying and teasing at college, as well as in the workplace. A foundation in some coping skills could help them later in life.

    As for what is going on, I agree with that PP that asked when did the wetting start, before or after the crying? There does seem to be something going on and the ass. teacher isn't help matters, but you need to find out the cause of the wetting and go from there.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 11:00 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • It is time to find out what is bothering her in class. If she is wetting again, after she had stopped, it may be due to something recent that is stressing her out. The assistant was definitely wrong! Just be patient (try) when you go to the meeting, and try to find out what is happening. If there is no possible solution, find another school... :)
    Grotezus

    Answer by Grotezus at 11:10 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • Since it's the weekend, try to use some creative play with your daughter so she can express to you what is happening at school. If it is so awful for her that she is wetting herself, it is probably very hard for her to talk about.

    The classroom is being managed completely inappropriately. The assistant is a bully and completely unprofessional. She needs to be fired. It's abusive to tease and ostracize any child for any reason. Tell the principal that.

    You might want to make a list of issues and talking points to take with you to the conference. The teacher doesn't want to lose her job so expect them to be on a defensive. You don't have to attack, but you can advocate for your child without attacking the teacher.

    I would suggest moving to a different classroom as the first solution. This classroom is clearly wrong for her.
    ecodani

    Answer by ecodani at 11:44 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • my son doesnt like his teacher either and has anxiety issues. the teacher is not understanding and we have had words when she told him that his crying is ridiculous and the school isnt helping. I am trying to figure out how to homeschool in my state.

    hopefully you will have a good confrence and get something done. Just wanted to tell you I am right there with you and know how upsetting this is. GoodLuck
    mandynjohnsmom

    Answer by mandynjohnsmom at 12:18 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • I sometimes think some of these teachers did not undergo training at all or if they did, not the right one, i get so irritated and i even feel like moving the kid to another school coz it has happened to me too. This is a small child and she/he should be handled as a child whether she is doing it knowingly or unknowingly. I've always thought of pulling my daughter out of her school coz of such behaviors, but again it is a good school I can tell by the way she performs, the way she understands what she is doing and she is even afraid of me asking the teacher saying that the teacher will punish her.
    Alycyaz

    Answer by Alycyaz at 12:21 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • layh41407 Obviously you were not torchured as a child in school from other kids.....I will not let my kids become a suicide statistic or be severely depressed because of the cruel & inhumane things that kids are doing out there today. I will protect my kids IF they get teased and picked on in later years! They can't cope if they are dead and I will NOT let that happen to my kids. Maybe you think it's good parenting to allow them to learn to cope, but that's condoning ABUSE
    _________________
    Yes, I was. To the point that my mother considered transfering me to another school. But guess what? I also wound up being bullied at one of my jobs and I was then able to handle it. Maybe since I was so tortured and then bullied again later in life, I have a different view. I stated that I know that it is a problem, but it can also be a learning tool. I now have coping skills as an adult. do you know how many children don't?
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 12:59 PM on Nov. 13, 2010