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What do you do about an 11 yr old that will not listen?

One of my good friends is on her last limbs with her 11 yr old he constantly comes home late from school like an hr or 2 late he will stay up late and sneak on video games when she grounds him from them! She has two other children under the age 4 now and she is sure trying her best! I have told her my opinions but he seems to still not listen! He seems like he could be a good kid! I told her to maybe get him into counceling to find out what is going on inside of him!


Asked by jem102675 at 11:10 AM on Nov. 13, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 17 (3,345 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • When she grounds him from the game system, she needs to remove the system. I take the controllers with me or hide them in my room. She can take away EVERYTHING but his bed and clothes and he has to earn everything back by listening and respecting her. If he can't be trusted to come home from school on time, then she needs to pick him up or find someone else to pick him up and bring him home. He probably doesn't need counseling because he is going through puberty and his hormones are going crazy. If he is being violent, then he needs counseling to learn to control his anger.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:14 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • Does she and her SO spend one on one time with him? Do they do things together with him? I would structure his day so he can not stray from it. I would pick him up from school, take any things that are being withheld from him and lock them up and he would get to use them when I said so. I would spend quality time with him alone and get a counselor's opinion to get things back on track. I had a similar situation when my youngest was a little older than this and we structured his time as I suggested after talking to a counselor. I don't know if homework is an issue but we had our son write the assignment in his notebook or the words "no homework" and then the teacher signed it as he left the class room. That ended that problem.

    Answer by elizabr at 11:18 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • I have mentioned all the above to her but I am not sure if she does the one on one time with him! Her new husband is a big part of it I have a feeling! Not the best in parenting he is!

    Comment by jem102675 (original poster) at 11:30 AM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • It's so sad she did not take the new husband's parenting skills into consideration before marrying him. He needs to be a friend and step dad to that boy

    Answer by elizabr at 2:46 PM on Nov. 13, 2010