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4 Bumps

How do you deal with loosing a child??? Personal questions

I have seen 2 posts lately were two women have lost their babies. I have had over 11 MCs and all I can do is thank god I did not birth a still born baby or god forbid a child that died later. How have you handled the grieving? If you have other children do you just focus on the others or is it more of a reminder?

Answer Question
 
Lena-Loo

Asked by Lena-Loo at 6:20 PM on Nov. 13, 2010 in Pregnancy

Level 5 (67 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I could NEVER image! Ever. My son had a near drowning experience. I held him, he wasnt breathing and didnt have a pulse. Hes fine now (CPR) and I deal with it everyday! I dont know how they deal, I can barely deal and my son is still here. They are much stronger woman then me.
    kiansmom0423

    Answer by kiansmom0423 at 6:23 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • Its been very hard. We lost our daughter at 34 weeks. She was 4 lbs 9 oz and 18 inches long,so in other words,a fullterm baby size wise. its been 10 years and I still break down on her death anniversary and sometimes when I see a little blond girl at the age she would be now. We have a 9 year old son also,and I treasure every day with him,but there is still a great big hole in my heart where my daughter should be.
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:25 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • I delivered my son as a stillbirth. There were no explanations as to what happened, no reasoning. His heart just stopped beating. I stayed at the hospital overnight and went home with a box. This box had two tiny blankets they had wrapped him in, his hat, his bracelets (which he never wore), an angel pin, a card, and molds of his hands and feet. I have this box and that's it. We buried him 3 days after I delivered him. I visit his grave once in awhile. At first, it was several times a week. I wanted to hold him so bad, so I would lay on the ground above him and cry. I had a blue blanket personalized with the words, Rest Peacefully In God's Hands, and we had them put that in the coffin with him. That way I felt he would be warm. I also went to the mall and made a Build a Bear in his memory which sits in the closet next to my box. I miss him terribly. We named him Miles, because he's so far away. We've had 2 boys since then--->
    Sharell8710

    Answer by Sharell8710 at 6:28 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • we are blessed. We wouldn't have our Jasiah if not for our Miles being needed in heaven, and that is how I see it. I'm better now. In fact now I'm no longer afraid to die because I have my son to go see. Someday.
    Sharell8710

    Answer by Sharell8710 at 6:30 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • Aww Sharell,I'm so sorry!
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:34 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • I'm sorry for your loss butterflyblue. It is the worst pain for a mother to feel. We will hold our babies again.
    Sharell8710

    Answer by Sharell8710 at 6:44 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • We lost our son Aaron almost 2 years ago. He had hypoplastic right heart syndrome with pulmonary vein atresia, pulmonary atresia, dextrocardia, and a spleenia. He passed 8 hours and 39 minutes after he was born. It's been a hard 2 years, but i am pregnant again with our 3rd baby. This one is healthy. During the first year espacially my husband and daughter really helped me through it. I should say we helped each other. I still miss our little guy, but I know we will be together again one day. :)
    mantamoo

    Answer by mantamoo at 7:50 PM on Nov. 13, 2010

  • Maybe TMI.....

    My first misscarriage I didnt know I was pregnant.I thought I was having a bad period and woke up in the middle of the night to flush a tiny baby down the toilet.It was like one of those "I didnt know i was pregnant shows".I could have bled to dealth after im sure but I was so stunned I couldnt tell anyone.It took me a few days to tell my husband.I had a healthy baby girl a few years after.My second misscarriage I was 13 1/2 weeks along.I went to the hospital but they sent me home and made me "pass" the baby myself.Another scary event.After that I vowed to never get pregnant again.Now here I am 14 weeks pregnant and living by faith everyday that this little one is healthy and will be born full term.

    Its really really hard everyday to live with my little ones not being here.But I know ill see them again someday and thats what keeps me going.Plus my beautiful little girl that I do have
    aliceinlove

    Answer by aliceinlove at 11:17 AM on Nov. 14, 2010

  • I had a miscarriage with my first pregnancy. It been over 25 yrs and I still think about it
    You will always love them in your heart
    HomeAlone45

    Answer by HomeAlone45 at 2:25 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • I lost my daughter on November 30 2010. She was stillborn a week and one day before her due date, which was December 8th 2010. She weighed 8lbs 12.5oz and we named her Zoie Madisyn. It is extremely hard to deal with, most days I just want to sleep all day and I rarely ever leave my house anymore unless I need to. I have a 3-year old son and he helps a lot but he doesn't take the pain away. He knows that his sister died and he asks questions sometimes but he doesn't really understand because she wasn't around for him to get to know. The doctor isn't sure what happened to our angel. She wasn't getting blood to her but he isn't sure if there was a problem with the placenta or with the cord. We have a memory box for her with an outfit, pictures, footprints, a lock of her hair, and a journal. We took lots of pictures ourselves too and we held her and kissed her and said our goodbyes. It's hard even typing this without crying.
    MarcsWife05

    Answer by MarcsWife05 at 1:19 PM on Feb. 4, 2011

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