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My son is SOOO bossy! And completely freaks out if he doesn't get his way!

My son tells EVERYONE what to do. I've tried explaining to him that it's not nice to boss people around but he doesn't seem to get it. I've even changed my way of asking him to do things because i thought maybe he was getting it from me always telling him to do things. so for example instead of "cameron clean up your toys!" i say "cameron, can you clean up your toys please?" so i changed it into asking him a question instead of just telling him to do it. but its not working! AND he has to have EVERYTHING his way! and i mean everything! In the car he's always saying "turn that way!" and if i don't, he completely freaks out, whining and crying. im sick of it!!! how can i change this????

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on Nov. 14, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (8)
  • First of all he is a child. You shouldn't be changing for him he needs to be changing for you. Your compromising too much for a child. You are the boss. Right now he seems to be the one in control and he knows it. I know it's hard but once he realizes that he is the child and you are the parent and there is nothing he can do about that he will calm down. When he throws a fit in the car ignore it, dot respond. He's looking for a reaction. You can do this.

    Answer by Jenaiko01 at 3:31 PM on Nov. 14, 2010

  • Be consistent momma hold your ground, do not let him tell you what to do. I made this mistake and my now 17 yr old son, Is bossy and becomes a total asshole when he does not get his way. Take if from me you do not want to be in my shoes right now.

    Answer by voni681 at 3:49 PM on Nov. 14, 2010

  • You need to change back to "Cameron, clean your room." If you keep it as a question, he can just say no. Be consistent and keep letting him know that is not the boss all the time. However, he needs to be the boss of something because he clearly wants to be in control of something.

    Answer by Pnukey at 4:13 PM on Nov. 14, 2010

  • Is he getting enough one on one time with you and your SO? Is he praised when he does things right? Lots of times the child goes for the negative attention when he doesn't get enough positive attention. You need to get through some of these tantrums, like when he tells you to turn in the car, by just toughing it out. You are the adult. It might be easie than you think, but you do need to change it. Also, every child has a "currency" which is the most important thing to him. Withhold that as punishment. Be consistent and calm. This can be turned around using love and caring.

    Answer by elizabr at 4:52 PM on Nov. 14, 2010

  • The first thing you need to do is not give in to his tantrums. Right now he does them because they work. If they stop working then he won't do it. The problem here is you...hes just being how your allowing him to be. Stay strong and good luck.

    Answer by Iamasinglemom99 at 8:06 PM on Nov. 14, 2010

  • No!! He thinks he is your boss at this point. You still need to tell him to do thing, not ask him.

    Answer by Shanna84 at 8:43 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • stop giving in to his freaking out... stop asking him, you're only giving into his "phase"... explain to him that you will ask when you can, but if you TELL him to do something you are the adult, he is the child, and it is his JOB to listen to you...

    Answer by asil at 11:57 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • girl he is running your life right now. it will be hard at the beginning but you need to get a handle on it. for things like this i dont spank but i will put him in time out which he hates and i dont care if he cries. same thing with tantrums. be consistant and it's hard i know. good luck.

    Answer by cuteness13983 at 7:23 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

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