Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Is everything in the home YOUR responsibility? (semi- angry rant)


Whenever I am home it is expected that I take care of everything. Getting the toddler snacks, sippy cups, time outs, reading, teaching, etc while holding the baby, cooking dinner, washing clothes, dishes, etc? THEN after the toddler goes to bed I have to do all the paper/computer work. Which tonight involves filling out health insurance papers, sending things to progressive, googling the best way to get squirrels out of an attic, printing out leases/applications for the rental. (of course the printer isn't working so I have to fix that and then my computer gave me a blue screen so I had to back everything up on the external hard drive). All while the baby is crying. My DH spent the night on the couch talking about how stressed HE is and went to bed at 8. 8? Now why can't I ever go to bed at 8? Or just leave dinner and the baby up to him and go lay down? Is this another double standard? Or just the way things ar

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:54 PM on Nov. 14, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • OMG. It seems like I am going through that exact same thing. I work 3rd shift on my job and don't get off until 4am, then I have to come home and force myself to stay awake so that I can get my children up and ready for school all while my BF lays in the bed saying "if I was you I would lay down, you will hear your alarm im going back to sleep". Then after getting them up I try to take a nap, only being awakened by him calling my name because he is too lazy to look for anything, all the while talking about how he needs a job, but can't find one and that is stressing him out. Then he gets up and leaves the house only to have me home cleaning and cooking before time for me to go to work again. Why is it that I can never sit down all day or get up and leave and stay gone for hours without having to be at work? Where does it say women have to do everything around the house?

    Answer by dirtyswifey10 at 12:09 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Most things in the home are my responsibilty. Dh will help out with the kids but not on a regular basis. If he's tired after work he goes bed, could be 6pm or 10pm whenever he decides. I handle everything with school, house, cooking, cleaning, kids, social calendar, you name I. Lasted job that I found out was mine is to be the house directory. Omg if I don't the exact location of something. Example dh wore his slippers this evening, went to bed, decided to get up and slippers were gone. He was pissed off yelling cause I couldn't tell him where they were. 10 minutes later he found them in the closet. He must havput them away. But it's my fault I didn't know right away. BS!!
    I'm getting tired of being the maid, butler, gardener, etc all on my own. This is suppose to be a partnership 50/50 not 98/2.

    Answer by Jessica45 at 12:10 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Well, in a way yes. My DH is military, and he goes on training classes and TDY's quite often. So I just get used to doing everything, there's nothing he can do when he's not here. BUT when he is here, he appreciates what all I have to do and he will do the laundry, or watch the kids for me to have a break. I do thank God that he is an awesome cook, but I hate cleaning up after he cooks sometimes lol. Have you talked to your husband about exactly how bad this makes you feel? Work out something where you can have one night a week where YOU get a break. You shouldn't feel like you are having to do everything while he sits there because even if he's worked all day, I can almost guarantee you haven't been just sitting on your butt all day. And if you have, well then yeah, I would expect you do to the work that's just logical. But I don't think you are one of those women lol.

    Answer by AprilDJC at 12:33 AM on Nov. 15, 2010


    Answer by GracieBabysMom at 1:36 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.