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3 Bumps

I don't know what to do......

I'm told, "You're too nice." or "Do you know why I'm mean to you? Because I know you'll forgive me."

I've always believed if I treat others the way I want to be treated, I'll have true friends. But it seems that no one stays very long. Is true friendship a thing of the past? When we get bored we just discard each other like our cell phones? Should I give up the idea of having lasting relationships with girlfriends? What's do you think?

Answer Question
 
Prayerpartner

Asked by Prayerpartner at 5:11 AM on Nov. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Level 20 (10,072 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I totally believe that there is no such thing as true friendship anymore, at least, from.anyone I know. I know what friendship is and it seems no one else does. Either my "friends" are fake, don't care, stab me in the back, don't put any effort into the friendship, are beyond self-centered, or just toss me away when they don't want me around anymore..that's all I get anymore, and I've nealy given up on having female friends.
    -AJ

    Answer by -AJ at 5:16 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • nearly*
    -AJ

    Answer by -AJ at 5:17 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I've had what I though were friends but they had their own agenda for being my friend. For a while I said forget about having friends and went about my business with my DH and kids. Eventually God put a couple of real friends in my life and one best friend. No hidden agendas with these women. They support me when I'm going through tough times and celebrate with me the good times. We share each others childrens accomplishments as well as failures. I can tell my best freind anything and she's there for me to give me advice even if I don't like the advice but at least she's honest. Sometimes we need to look at the type people we are letting into our lives. I to believed treat others as you yourself want to be treated but that's not the case in real life. Just ask GOD to show you the real from the fake. Don't give up, be patient and set standards that you want in a friend. I was 33 when my true freinds came along.
    suelo74

    Answer by suelo74 at 5:21 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Thank you suelo74. I use to have friends from the Lord. But in the past six years living up here in the mountains, its been different. Each time I reach out and am their for them, they use me until they have no need of me or they get bored with me. I just don't understand. I see that many would rather be in abusive relationship these days. They are unhappy, bitter, and distant. They don't want to invest the time to being a friend. Only when is it convient to them do I matter. There are a few that are far away. I'm thankful for them, but it makes it hard to go have a girls day out or to invite them over for dinner. I know the holidays are the hardest because my husband and I are alone. We miss getting together with family..... plz pray for us.... that the Lord will open the doors He see's will be an encouragement as well as being able to share.... tk u
    Prayerpartner

    Comment by Prayerpartner (original poster) at 5:36 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I understand I have no family here where I live, only my husbands. I get along great with my M.I.L and 1 S.I.L. But sometimes I feel the rest of the family is against me. I at times feel lonely too. My mom lives in TX and I in GA. I'm sorry to hear about some of your friends situations. I"ll keep you in my prayers and hope we can be friends here on cafe mom.
    suelo74

    Answer by suelo74 at 5:48 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Be true to yourself. Be nice, treat people the way you want to be treated. If someone is constantly taking advantage of you, it's time to reconsider the relationship. It's on THEM that they choose to behave poorly, and it's your decision if you want to allow it to happen.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 8:49 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • It's tough without family around. And, yes, what a bummer we cant get together for a girls night out. But like you always say ...Maybe it's for the best. Man, would we get in trouble together. lol So for now we'll have to do with the phone, eMails and letters that take ages to travel from west to east.... but not the other way round! I wonder why that is?
    As for the true friends ... I don't know ... Every now and again you get lucky. And meanies have a sort of radar for weaker people, I think. I always thought "what you give is what you get" ... apperantly that's wrong. At least in your case. Hard to answer. (Not much of a cheer-up, lol)
    BeachMom81

    Answer by BeachMom81 at 9:03 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • you just be yourself dont worry what other people say & you will find a true friend out there
    Ricanmami1

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 12:40 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • No. dont give up on the idea. It may just take a while to find the right friend.
    stacy197866

    Answer by stacy197866 at 10:30 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • Thank you all. I'm feeling a lot better. You are right. I am blessed in many ways. After all, I have a loving husband and some friends in far away places who are very special and good to me! I was hurting yesterday because I knew a relationship that meant a lot to me was coming to an end. It just took me awhile to realize that there was nothing more I could do and had to let go. Thank you for the Phone call and for prayers. I appreciate you guys so much! Thank You!!!!
    Prayerpartner

    Comment by Prayerpartner (original poster) at 3:03 AM on Nov. 17, 2010

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