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2 Bumps

How would you deal?

We went to visit family and my neice who is only about 5 months younger than my daughter is really whinny and is to used to being babied and getting everything she wants. My daughter brought two toys so she could share which she is very good at. And they were sharing and then my neice threw a huge fit because she wanted the toy of my daughter that she was playing with, I told her we take turns and its your turn with the other one. She just whined and kept crying told her mom and Then she told my daughter to give it to her I stood up for my daughter and told her no they are takeing turns she can share too. Then she looked at my neice and said i will get you your own toy because Ava my daughter is mean. What would you do?? My daughter was taking turns and sharing.

Answer Question
 
lovinmybaby87

Asked by lovinmybaby87 at 11:09 AM on Nov. 15, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 12 (704 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • I would ask her who's fault is it that she is mean. Afterall she is the parent raising her.
    arenad

    Answer by arenad at 11:11 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I'd tell the mother that she's not helping the niece with coping and socialization skills. I would have corrected the mom in front of both girls and told them all "NO, Ava is NOT mean. Ava is good to share her toys."
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:17 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Your sister or sister in law is a stupid bitch. I would have picked up my daughter and her toys, and left. Period.
    MamaAlice54

    Answer by MamaAlice54 at 11:21 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • You did a great thing by sticking up for your daughter!!!! Any mother would.. That mother is obviously not raising her daughter with morales or respect!!!!
    Niseyjy77

    Answer by Niseyjy77 at 11:21 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • wow.... some people just dont know any better to parent their kids with better manners....in trhe end she's just making it harder for herself and shes raising a horrible child that will feel that everything should be handed to her and thats not the way this world turns.. so keep up the good work and next time just bring one toy... so there is nothing to fight over
    miritrose

    Answer by miritrose at 11:22 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I would pick up my daughter and leave. My daughter doesnt need to hear that she is being mean, when she is only taking turns. I would tell your neices mom that until she teaches her daughter to share and take turns, I wont be bringing my daughter back over to play. The concept of taking turns and sharing is very important, and if her mom isnt teaching her, my daughter doesnt need to be around her kid.

    And it would take all my self control to not react when she called my daughter mean.. Pssshh... I'd LOVe to say.. "Excuse me?! Did I just hear you right? Did you just call my daughter mean because she is taking turns and your spoiled little brat cant understand that because you Arent teaching her? I'm sorry, Ava is not mean. Your child is spoiled and you arent teaching her manners at all. And until your child learns how to behave, she wont be playing mwith my daughter. I dont want her picking up YOUR childs bad habits.... "
    Mme.Langley

    Answer by Mme.Langley at 11:25 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I think that her kiddo is going to have much bigger issues! I have to say that I have an only child (5) and was so proud of myself because I thought he was a good sharer! This weekend we had a couple of boys over to spend the night,, and my son did not share well at all, but instead of giving in, we layed down the law! I think your SIL needs a wake-up call, you didn't say exactly how old your the girls are, but perhaps you could gently talk to her about calling your daughter mean in front of her,,, me thinks if the shoe had been on the other foot SIL would have been nutty!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 11:30 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Ignore her.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 11:30 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Depends on the ages of the kids, 5 months can be a pretty good maturity gap in little ones.

    However, the mom was wrong for her comment regardless of the age gap.
    luckysevenwow

    Answer by luckysevenwow at 11:38 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Thanks for all the advice our daughters are three. And my big issue is we dont see them very much, they moved away, but when they lived close i did stop going over there because they all treat my neice like a little princess always whats wrong are you ok what do you want baby and treat my daughter like a little brat or something always knock it off did you hit her why are you being like that, i dunno it drove me nuts. But no matter what my daughter still loves her cousin. But i did talk to all of them before and my one sister-in-law said we treat ava like that because she is independant and doesnt need our help. I said so what doesnt mean you treat her like shit excuse my language. And i have talked to my husband about it and that is the reason we now only see them on special occasions and holidays. My family treats my daughter like gold so i figure it makes up for his family bein shitty and i know i can not change them!!
    lovinmybaby87

    Comment by lovinmybaby87 (original poster) at 11:52 AM on Nov. 15, 2010

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