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3 Bumps

Should I have another child, knowing it will probably be high-risk?

I lost my first pregnancy, my second (my son) was 6 weeks premature, my third (my daughter) was healthy but they took her by c-section 3 weeks early b/c of how they did my first c-section. Both of them were small in utero and are still small for their age...but me and my DH are small too. My family says I shouldn't have any more, but we want one more. Should I take my family's advice or risk wanting to beat myself up if/when I have another bed rest pregnancy?


Asked by brandyj at 4:39 PM on Nov. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Level 21 (10,228 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Your family is probably worried about you after seeing all that you've went though with your first pregnancies. They're not being nosey or "buttinski's" after-all you were and still are their "baby" (if it's your mom and dad that's worried). It most likely will be a "high risk pregnancy" considering all that you've gone through. If it is something that would potentially put a baby's health at risk I wouldn't even consider trying to conceive it. Because I feel that it would be selfish of me to want to bring a baby into this world for my pleasure of having it knowing full well that it might have health problems. If it's just a matter of me getting bed rest and nothing me losing my life...I would try to conceive.
    It's something to think about.


    Answer by Missikat75 at 6:57 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I think you should adopt. If it is a risk to your health, that doesn't help anyone and it puts you and your family at risk.

    Answer by TwoBrownDogs at 10:59 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • It's up to you and your husband. You know what your body can handle. I can understand your family's concern about your wellbeing, but ultimately it's your choice!

    Answer by michelle121003 at 6:50 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • If I had my doctor telling me that it wouldn't be my best interest to have another child, then I probably wouldn't.

    Answer by mz_erica03 at 5:24 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Does your doctor think it would be high risk? Or is this just your family trying to be buttinskis?

    It would most likely be high risk. I had a classic incision (vertical) with my son's birth, so I can't have contractions. Looking back, I wonder if there was something I could have done to avoid it. But I can't think of anything....except maybe more water, less stress.

    Comment by brandyj (original poster) at 4:50 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I want another child, but it will get tricky if I have to go on bed rest.

    Comment by brandyj (original poster) at 4:46 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Does your doctor think it would be high risk? Or is this just your family trying to be buttinskis?

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:45 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I say, don't talk with your family. It's not their body. It's not their family. It's your and your DH's family, and it's your body. This needs to be a decision made by you and your DH with the help of your OB. You will be the one on bed rest, and your DH will be the main one doing extra help, right? Your OB is your doctor. So, it should be you, DH and doc talking.
    Personally, I don't know. I probably would. Maybe, but I don't know how hard things were that you already went through. I might not. I really can't say yah or nay. Sorry:(

    Answer by Raine2001 at 4:45 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Well, first of all, your family doesn't make the decisions on what is right for YOUR family. Secondly, you and your husband are the only ones that should be deciding something like this and finally, it is your body so you have the final say on what happens to your body.

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 4:43 PM on Nov. 15, 2010