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4 Bumps

How did you feel when your ex got engaged to someone else?

I dated someone called Alan years ago...I did not love him, but we had some really lovely times and I cared about him. He loved me and treated me like an absolute princess. In the end thats partly why we split- I felt bad because I didn't love him. He deserved someone who did.

I got married just over a week ago to the only man I have ever truly loved and am very happy. However I recently found out that Alan has got engaged. I have a weird feeling in my chest, like a lump in my throat. I do not and never did love him, but I can't understand what this feeling is. Im wondering if its jealousy as I know he's finally moved on from me? Or is it because I know we arent a part of eachothers lives at all anymore? I dont know! So just curious how others have felt!

Once again, I am VERY happy and loved up with my husband. So please don't bash.

Answer Question
 
little.knickers

Asked by little.knickers at 5:38 PM on Nov. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,322 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • He's not, but if he did, better her than me! We get along and see eye to eye when it comes to our son, but I wouldn't want him back.
    I think what you're feeling is perfectly normal though.
    TARARENEE

    Answer by TARARENEE at 5:41 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I think I can relate... I have felt little "twinges." I'm not jealous or have any feelings of regrets... but there's that little thing/sting (whatever you wanna call it).... lol
    mz_erica03

    Answer by mz_erica03 at 5:41 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • It's a touch of jealousy, acknowledge it and then just let it fade away, it will. I experienced the same thing. I dated a guy through out college and he ended up marrying a Sabrina with blonde hair that looked a bit like me. That helped ease the minor jealousy. ;)
    SabrinaBean

    Answer by SabrinaBean at 5:42 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I actually helped my ex husband pick out the ring. I am extremely excited for them and can't wait to help them plan their wedding. And yes, my ex & his fiance attended my wedding to my new hubby as well.
    Orionsgirl

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 5:43 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • He isnt but I honestly wouldnt care. I have zero feelings for him. So good for him he found someone new to put up with his crap lol
    JakesCupcake

    Answer by JakesCupcake at 5:46 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • When my ex husband finally got engaged to the whore that he left me for it hurt really bad since I wasn't anywhere near over him.
    Moms_Angels1960

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 5:47 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Very normal emotion. I don't know anyone that likes to think they have been replaced. It will leave and you'll be wondering why you even felt that way.
    zbee

    Answer by zbee at 5:49 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • honestly..i think my ex got married because i did. He was married to this girl that he only knew for 2 months just 3 months after i got married...their marriage only lasted for 4 months then he marrys someone else. IDK. I do know though that he is not one to tie down so i dont expect this second marriage to last that long either...if it does then she is one strong woman or either they they have an "open marriage"
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 5:51 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • It is exactly like you said...good insight btw.
    " Im wondering if its jealousy as I know he's finally moved on from me? Or is it because I know we arent a part of eachothers lives at all anymore?"
    You two had shared something special for quite awhile...now he's sharing special moments with someone else.
    Although you didn't love him it was a period of time where you had someone that you understood and who understood you and now that is moving on and a chapter is really, finally closing.
    This is the "true" severence of that relationship and he's moved on.
    But you are strong and are in a good relationship so you'll be fine, sweetie
    :)
    Missikat75

    Answer by Missikat75 at 5:52 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I know exactly how you feel this happened to me about 7 years ago and boy did it really hurt but I have found out that through all my pain that he was not the man God had for me anyway I prayed for someone that would love me and respect me and I realized that he was not for me and then he thought I would stay after he married just so he say for the convience that he knew her 4 months more than he knew me but I say the H with that
    1212tink

    Answer by 1212tink at 5:57 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

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