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7 Bumps

What does this mean?

So after my husband tells me he loves me and cares for me but is no longer in love with me he has been 10 times more intimate. What is that suppose to mean. I'm really confused at what he is trying to tell me? Anyone have any tips or meanings for me?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:56 PM on Nov. 15, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • I would seriously tell him to keep his wee-wee in his pants until he can figure out just what exactly the "not in love with you" part means!

    Answer by mz_erica03 at 5:59 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Based solely on what you have written.

    My guess would be that he is trying to invoke/bring about those "in love" feelings once again.

    The feeling of "being in love" is brought on by action. We feel "in love" because of the actions/behaviors of our partner (and ourselves in regards to us putting our love into action and recipricating our partner's actions).. Sounds like he is trying to "rekindle' in the only way that he really knows how.

    If I were you. I would recipricate his actions, and start putting in my own loving actions/behaviours in order to rekindle those "in love" feelings between the two of us.. That's just me though

    Answer by pixie_trix at 6:04 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Hes feeling guilty about something. Id tell him...thats ok about not being "in love" with you.... tell him your "in love with the new guy down at the tire center.... ahhh hes soo dreamy. Then walk away. Maybe you should stage a few mock dates to the movies with a friend. *wink* (dont give him the details..its a secret) *wink* Maybe he needs to feel a little competition! I bet he'd be back "in love" in no time. Funny how guys want the things that cant have and dont want the things that already have. They are so WEIRD!

    Answer by lacyjones at 6:06 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • I would NOT tell him that your "in love with" anyone else even it is in jest.
    I agree totally with Pixie Trix...that he maybe trying to rekindle that feeling with you.
    However I would totally tell him that it's hurting you by confusing your emotions.
    Good Luck Sweetie....I hope all works out for you and your man.
    I'm here to talk to if you need me!

    Answer by Missikat75 at 6:16 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Sometimes we don't realize how things sound or feel until we say them out loud. Seems to me like he didn't like how that felt and he his trying to change. If he is being more intimate, and still seems committed to your relationship, then I agree with the above poster that he is trying to rekindle old feelings to save your marriage... like he WANTS to feel 'in love' again.

    If he does not seem still committed to your marriage, I would worry that the end is near. I have heard of people doing this right before they file for divorce. Leaving the other person to feel like.. they "stocked up" on sex before they moved out.

    I think it is probably the first thing... but just keep your eyes open.

    Answer by Niki_sd at 6:17 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • May I ask.

    Have the 2 of you become disconnected?
    Have the 2 of you let your interpersonal relationship (your man-woman relationship. that relationship outside of parenthood and the dailies) wane?
    Do the 2 of you have fun together and enjoy each other's company as a couple?
    Do the 2 of you know and understand each other's way of communicating/interpreting love, affection, admiration, adoration, etc?

    Answer by pixie_trix at 6:29 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Maybe the fear of that which he is familiar is driving this.

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 6:44 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • i would take that to mean that he is NOT in LOVE with you and he has somebody else that he IS in LOVE with - being in love with somebody else gives him more passion to be with you

    Answer by kaysimon132461 at 8:12 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • it could be either
    1)he is trying real hard to rekindle stay with you
    2(he is in love with someone else (maybe does or does not have a physical relationship with them) but you are the avaliable one

    sorry, very confusing for you, time will tell
    i hope it is the first one

    Answer by fiatpax at 8:17 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

  • Well it sounds like to me he has reconnected with you. Why not ask him?

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 9:13 PM on Nov. 15, 2010

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