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How do I make my mother stay out of my life?

My mother hates my husband we've been together 2 years. She has went above and beyond she says she spent $2,000 to have him investiagted and he is an "awful" person. If he had done anything in his past life that was so bad he wouldn't be able to have the job he does. He came into a ready made family and he is great to me and my child, he is a hard worker and a very caring man. She is a manipulative person and even made the statement last Thanksgiving that she didn't like to share me. She has went so far as to go to my daughters school and take her cell phone that she bought only because she didn't think that she should have to wait 2 months to upgrade, and the newest is she even though the electric bill was in my dads and mines names and has never been late or had disruptive service had it shut off leaving me stuck with 467.00 to get it turned back on in my name. Worst part she lives a football field away.....i'm at a loss.

Answer Question

Asked by Wiggs1030 at 8:28 PM on Nov. 16, 2010 in Relationships

Level 1 (2 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • Get the bills out of her name or yours, whatever it will take to make sure you dont get stuck with it. Then I would ask for the proof your husband was bad or an apology or your NOT going to Thanksgiving.

    Answer by Misteh at 8:31 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • It might be time to cut her out. I had to with my dad, after one of those "last straw" incidents. If you call her and tell her to stay away from you and the kids, will she respect that? Is that possible when you live so close? Or will it require a restraining order and an out o state move to get her gone?

    Answer by musicpisces at 8:31 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • If you value your marriage you need to send to tell her straight up that you will not tolerate her interfwerence anymore. Change all bills so that you cannot be 'stuck' again. If need be go get a restraining order. Make sure the school has a copy. Make alternate plans for Thanksgiving. Let her know if she continues..she will lose all contact with you for a very long time.

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 8:37 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • Sounds like the place to start is to move and get her (or your dad's) names off of anything.

    Answer by Jessica157 at 8:38 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • MOVE farther away!! I had a crazy ex mother in law and when I moved farther away I didn't have to deal with her nearly as much. And gain your independance by having your bills in ONLY your husbands or your name.

    Answer by worriedmommy600 at 8:41 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • my parents dont like my hubby at all and we have been together 12 yrs. married for only 4. my mom does alot of horrible things to me and says the wrong things about my kids. my hubby is hispanic and im white so my kids are mixed. we live in chicago and they live on the west coast. so we only speak through text but when i lived closer i told both parents if they couldn't grow up and act like an adult they wouldnt see my kids or me ever again. my mom steals my pain meds and says my kids arent her grandkids. so i feel ur pain. do as some people say above and also distance urself from ur mom.

    Answer by knagsmom at 8:58 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • sounds like mom is control freak time to put ever thing in new hubby name ,and start looking for new home one mom needs to take a plan

    Answer by dutchcanadain at 9:36 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • i would not move . i would get a restraining order.

    Answer by maya123 at 9:47 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • Too bad you can't choose your relatives, right?! Have a big girl talk with your mother, and let her know that if she makes you choose between your husband and her, she's going to lose. Explain that you're happy with your life aside from the problems she is causing, and if she continues to butt into your life, you'll never speak to her again, and you'll make sure she's not involved in the life of your child.

    Answer by GoodyBrook at 10:50 PM on Nov. 16, 2010

  • If anything of yours is in her name, get it changed, then she can't hold it over your head. Since she has made it well known that she doesn't like your husband, she has two choices. Either accept who you married, or she can go on with her life. It's up to her.

    What I don't get is, why should she feel like she is sharing you? That's weird in my opinion. Yes, you are her daughter and you can't change that. But you are married to him, and he is also your family. If she doesn't want to be a part of your life, she doesn't have to be. It sounds like she would rather you be miserable. Have you ever told her what you thought?

    That wasn't exactly fair for her to take the cellphone away from your daughter at school. If she didn't want her to have it, she shouldn't have gave it to her in the first place.

    One other suggestion, Move further away, it sounds like you need some distance between you.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 1:05 AM on Nov. 17, 2010

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