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2 Bumps

cheating???

okay so if a few people have told you that they believe that your husband is cheating on you as he wants to end your marriage after 4 months and he says he is not cheating... both are so hard to believe and obviously I want to believe my husband but then why would people tell me otherwise??

Answer Question
 
meagan678

Asked by meagan678 at 5:44 PM on Nov. 17, 2010 in Relationships

Level 19 (6,793 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • I would do some spying and find out what's going on for yourself. I wouldn't right off what other's have said, but merely look into phone records, emails, ect.
    momofone221

    Answer by momofone221 at 5:46 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • What has he told you his reasons for wanting to end such a brief marriage are?
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 5:47 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • every time ive tried to snoop hes caught me, im the worst at being sneaky lol
    meagan678

    Comment by meagan678 (original poster) at 5:47 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • Hmmm ask the person who told you he was cheating who it was with and what they saw. Can you trust him? Did he tell you he wants to end your marriage or did the other person?
    mmmegan38

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 5:48 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • he just says that he doesnt want to put in the work anymore. i dont know what he was thinking but marriage is work even if its the easiest marriage. ive tried having him go to counseling but no luck yet. hes so for us then against us, one day is like yes we'll get help, the next no i dont want us anymore
    meagan678

    Comment by meagan678 (original poster) at 5:49 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • Ask the person for proof. And if your husband has been adulterous, but doesn't want to end your marriage, do you think you could forgive him? Maybe you should try marriage counseling. It helped me and my husband A LOT.
    mommymeof3

    Answer by mommymeof3 at 5:50 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • You are correct. Marriage is work. It also takes dedication as well. Which he sounds lacking of.

    Let's try being more specific, if you are able to.

    What are the issues/problems that he doesn't want to work on or that he feels aren't worth working on?

    When he is "against" the relationship, what is it that he is against?
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 5:52 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • I think you need proof of some kind to know what to believe. At least that's something I would consider before jumping to conclusions about a situation of this magnitude.
    CafeMochaMom1

    Answer by CafeMochaMom1 at 5:54 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • hes against me, he says he cant see a future with me anymore and doesnt want any part of it.
    then he'll sit there and talk about our future, its like a roller coaster
    meagan678

    Comment by meagan678 (original poster) at 5:54 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • Since I do not personally know the 2 of you. I can only share my personal experiences..

    My personal experience with my husband over the span of our 25 year marriage is this.

    The times he has been that wishy washy/confused sounding, there were underlying issues that were not being addressed and discussed.

    The only way to stop the roller coaster, is by him being honest with himself, and with you, and sharing his reasons behind his feelings.

    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 6:00 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

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