Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

6 Bumps

"But you're such a nice person"...

The response I got from parents on the PTO board when they stepped over the line, and asked where I went to church.

Does being an Atheist automatically make me a "bad person", incapable of healthy, pleasant interpersonal interaction? Does it somehow make me a personal threat or danger to those around me?

Should we all just be branded with a scarlet letter, so that others can avoid the distastefully awkward social situations which ensue when they cross over barriers which ought not be?

Answer Question
 
ObbyDobbie

Asked by ObbyDobbie at 9:35 PM on Nov. 17, 2010 in Religious Debate

Level 34 (70,074 Credits)
Answers (59)
  • I don't think not being religous makes you a bad person.

    But I also don't understand how they over stepped their bounds. Sounds to me like they were just trying to be friendly and make conversation.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:38 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • How is asking the question "Where do you go to church" not overstepping bounds? First, they make the assumption that I share their religious beliefs, and then inquire regarding something which has absolutely nothing to do with the task at hand (Public school) which also happens to be a personal question.
    That is in bad taste. Very, very bad manners.
    ObbyDobbie

    Comment by ObbyDobbie (original poster) at 9:40 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • How did they over step? I guess I need more information. Are you offended by the word church? Most people in America go to SOME kind of church. It's not like the question was completely out there. But no being an athiest does not make you a bad person.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:41 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • I don't think anyone overstepped their bounds, I think they were just trying to get to know you. They could also have been looking for a new church.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:41 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • That same thing could go for an Agnostic too. I think people here want to save me and introduce me to Jesus. Ahhhh,well. I know all about it and realized what it all really meant by the time I was about 20. It all means that the Bible is a good book of fiction and Jesus and God are main characters in a whole lot of stories to make people less afraid of dying. THere was no Adam and EVe ,the world was not created in 7 days,and no "virgin birth" . Jesus was a nice guy. That's about all I need to say.
    kerp1960

    Answer by kerp1960 at 9:41 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • "Most people in America go to SOME kind of church"

    MOST< NOT ALL. To assume ALL is narrow minded. And ones' personal spiritual life and how they celebrate it is no one's business.
    sahmamax2

    Answer by sahmamax2 at 9:43 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • No, it doesn't automatically make you a bad person. Some people use the question about where you attend church as a social opening. Most people don't really see that as a rude question. If I had asked and you responded you're an atheist, i probably would have just said "Oh. Ok." and moved on to another subject.
    Christians do not want to come across as rude when asking, or in the surprise response of But you're such a nice person..." Admittedly not the brightest thing to say, but I think you just caught them by surprise.
    duckigrrl

    Answer by duckigrrl at 9:43 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • I think you are being WAY to sensitive about this. Asking where you go to church does not mean your assuming that the person shares the same religious beliefs with you. I've been asked by numerous people in numerous situations where I go to church.

    Do I think they were wrong to say what they said (IF THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED)? Yes. But I don't see what the big deal is with asking someone where they go to church.

    I think, yet again, you're trying to start an anti-religion post to see who will bite. It was a question which you seem to have answered appropriately. Get over yourself.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:45 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • I don't think it's overstepping just to ask. People who live in the "main stream" tend to feel like everyone does and they assume you do too. However, if their feelings about you or how they treat you changes based solely on your answer, now they are in the wrong.
    SabrinaMBowen

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 9:46 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

  • " Admittedly not the brightest thing to say, but I think you just caught them by surprise. "

    I'm sure they were caught off guard. I told an acquaintance I was an atheist after he asked me for advice regarding his church friends, and you would have thought he was going to keel over. He did NOT expect my answer of "well I'm an atheist, Im not sure you want to ask me about that". It was unfathomable to him that I could be an atheist.
    sahmamax2

    Answer by sahmamax2 at 9:46 PM on Nov. 17, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN