Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

i just slapped my 3yr old hand for throwing his cup in my face for not giving him ice cream

i dont even spank. but i snapped. bc he has had so many treats today. and he should be in bed . i felt horrible minutes afterwards.. and i kissed his hand and i said sorry.
do u think slapping the hand is the same as spanking.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:46 AM on Nov. 18, 2010 in General Parenting

Answers (14)
  • No. Relax. He obviously needed to realize what he did was wrong. You sent the message loud and clear. I really try not to discipline my kids when I'm angry but we're human. It happens. They recover and learn a valuable lesson, as do you.

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 1:50 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • Yes, of course it's the same thing... And guess what, he'll be better for it! Good for you!

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 1:53 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • i think im more angry with myself that it WAS done out of anger... im not a big one spanking.. but mybe i might consider it.. if i can do IT while im not on the verge of snapping. i know he was tired bc right now he is alseep under neath the computer desk... and im just waiting for him to be in a solid sleep to move him into his bed. im not sure bc i was for a long time sooooo not for spanking. but im starting to see mybe a controlled spanking.... could be better then a time out .. and me yelling. , i GUESS WE LEARN AS WE GO.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:06 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • getting mad at him for not going to bed when he maybe hopped up on sugar is displacing responsibility. 1 your kid will learn how to manipulate you emotionally more easily for bad attention when other attention is not available. 2 acting out of anger is ineffective response yet honest and a learning experience you can continue or grow from (research alternatives for when you and little one are strung out. You seem conscientious enough to extract your share of responsibility. Start early with explaining your emotions simply without blame, and what he did to deserve discipline, time to think about it and apologies after, thats how I see Super Nanny succeed with insane house-holds. Make this little man an emotionally responsible and capable human being, he gets it already you learn to communicate, and when he can use his words not in anger, and respectfully because you do You both are winners, and so is the rest of us for you two!

    Answer by freyjawire at 3:00 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • No, its not the same thing. If you didn't discipline him he might of just taken you as a joke. You can definitely spank your child without abusing your child.

    Answer by AirForceMommy10 at 5:21 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I don't spank either and have had this happen a couple of times. It is not the same as spanking, but I do understand why you are upset it was done out of anger. No one is perfect and we just have to remember the next time we get angry to try not to do it again. I am sure your son will be fine though.

    Answer by MooNFaeRie30 at 5:25 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • Too many treats + out of his routine = cranky boy who will throw cup!

    Really, seriously, smacked his hand. You didn't throw boiling oil on him!


    Answer by Wimsey at 8:26 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • It's okay, I don;t recommend doing it all the time...LOL I am a soanker, but only when nothing else is working, but you are a goo mommy who successfully taught a lesson! Relax!

    Answer by JoLee12345 at 8:34 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • You did what you needed to. I am a spanker. But I send him to his room for a few minutes while I calm down (if I am angry). Than I go in there and tell him WHY he is getting the spanking, give him the spanking, then make him tell me why he got the spanking. Doing it that way ensures I am calm when I spank.

    Answer by nsrush83 at 9:46 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • You shouldn't have apologized. You don't want to teach him that you repremanding him is wrong. A slap on the hand does not get an apology. He will learn to manipulate that to his advantage somehow. Kids are too smart...

    We all do things out of anger. I one time threw a whole cup of yogurt against the wall because DD said i put bugs in it, when i did not & she refused to eat it ( i MUST have been PMSing). Don't worry about it. You didn't do any harm to your child! He's OK!

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:49 AM on Nov. 18, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.