Ask what they need, then do it. I can't tell you how many times people have offered help, but aren't available or willing to help when the time comes. Even if it's something as simple as doing dishes or folding laundry, or watching their kids one day while they go out to run errands or visit the person in the hospital. Whatever they need. Example: when DH started having health problems again, we got lots of food. We really didn't need lots of food; I had the cooking under control, and we had plenty of groceries. It was a nice gesture, but unneeded. What we really needed was help with housework- dishes, laundry, childcare, that sort of thing since I work and he had up to that point done most of the domestic stuff. I appreciated more the day several people showed up and did ALL our dishes and most of our laundry- it would have been nice to have that once or twice a month instead of more food.
at 11:54 AM on Nov. 19, 2010