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How to get my new husband to be to stop trying to suppot his ex-wife's household?

I think I am being miss understood. He is a great Dad. But she is taking advantage of him. She gets her hair done, nails done and buys new clothes but doesn't have money to buy the kids clothes? She knows if she doesnt buy it he will and thats why she does it. Now he wants to furnish her home, because she has not bought the kids beds. She has a new man and a new life and he still wants to buy things that she should be buying. Yes he should do somethings but not all, how in the world is he going to have alife for himself much less for us? I just do not like her taking advantage of him. some of you are right, May be I should not marry him .

Answer Question
 
MonicaV67

Asked by MonicaV67 at 2:48 PM on Nov. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • HE lets her take advantage.. He is an amazing dad though! Of course, any amazing parent would, no matter the circumstances, not let their children go without.
    SuperrMommyy

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 2:49 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • Your right...SOME THINGS but not all!! I hate when women spend the child support money on themselves and crap. ITS FOR THE KIDS! Hoep your DH snaps out of it soon!
    JakesCupcake

    Answer by JakesCupcake at 2:54 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • Maybe you shouldn't marry him, she sounds like a flake,but you can't really blame him for wanting his kids to have beds to sleep in! I would either get custody of the kids, accept this is the way it is, or run for the hills~ hope it works out!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 2:54 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • as long as its for the kids and he not buying things for her i wouldnt worry and he open enuff to tell u wat he doing so i wouldnt worry
    kai302

    Answer by kai302 at 2:54 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • My position is the same... The kids need things, and regardless of what she does with the child support, he makes sure they have what they need- Good for him!!!

    I come from a blended family, my father had two other children that he supported- as well as my mother, her 3 children, and much later... me. My brother and sister didn't know until they were adults that he paid child support, because they never saw any of that money (new cars, new clothes, new boyfriends... their mom blew it). But when they needed something, regardless of what we had, or didn't have (we weren't rich, and lived very frugally), he made sure that they had what they needed too. As an adult, I admire him for that! It made things stressful at times, and was hard on us all because we knew what she was doing... But he still did the right thing.
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 2:57 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • Err... You consider him wanting to be a responsible parent who provides for his children a bad trait?

    I'd say HE shouldn't marry YOU.
    Allergic2Stupid

    Answer by Allergic2Stupid at 3:06 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • HE lets this go on, HE allows and enables it. you are not married yet?well if you cannot tolerate this in him, then DONT marry him. it wont likely change. I find it very hard to believe the children have NO BEDS. sorry. I agree that him wanting to be a responsible parent wether you see it as her taking advantage of him or not, is a good trait in him and your bitterness is not a good trait for you hon.
    katiPeas

    Answer by katiPeas at 3:23 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • She isn't taking advantage of him at all. Sounds like he is still in love with her and wants to do all he can to make sure she is taken care of. You sound very jealous and you should be while she is in his heart there will never be enough room for you. I would move on.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:53 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

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