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Would you approach a friend who verbally abuses her kids or mind your own business?

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OhSoPoetic

Asked by OhSoPoetic at 3:15 PM on Nov. 18, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Level 4 (33 Credits)
Answers (17)
  • Be an example and maybe she will bring up how you parent and then talk to her then? Good luck with this one.
    bjojola

    Answer by bjojola at 3:16 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I would sit down with her and say i was concerned. if she was a good friend she would listen. if she wouldnt i would report her.
    katiPeas

    Answer by katiPeas at 3:20 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • Not sure I could be friends with someone who was verbally abusing her kids. I think verbal abuse is as bad as physical abuse. I would talk to her about it and let her know she needs to get help so her kids are not damaged by her words. I would let her know if she doesn't I will report her to someone who can make her get that help.  Anyone who minds their own business when a child is being abused is just as bad as the abuser. 

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:22 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I would tread lightly, but perhaps start of , gosh I have noticed how tense you are with the kids lately,,,maybe she doesn't even realize she is doing it!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 3:22 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I agree with bjojola, be the example. When the opportunity arises maybe say something along the lines of "You seem so stressed today, is there anything I can do for you?" See where the conversation goes from there. I hope it improves. :)
    Jessica157

    Answer by Jessica157 at 3:23 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • If you do nothing than you are compicit in the abuse. When it is an adult being treated poorly by another adult the rules may be different, but children can not fend for themselves and when they are being mistreated they need someone to speak up and help them. How many stories do you hear about kids who were being abused and there were chances for people to help them and they did nothing? Verbal abuse can destroy your self-esteem and identity, cause you to make horrible choices growing up to try and get some approval, and make you vulnerable to other abusers in your life. You should speak up. You may risk your friendship but is your friendship more important than speaking up for innocent, helpless kids? I don't think so. I would go so far as to call CPS if I felt I had to, I doubt they would take her kids away but they would probably get her help. Or tell her you want to take a parenting class and ask her to go with you. GL!
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 3:30 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I would probably say something. but it would depend on how good of a friend she is
    CarlieJS

    Answer by CarlieJS at 3:55 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • You can try, you can be polite and helpful, but I think a woman who is verbally abusive to her children in front of others will not take even a hepful hint ....she will be verbally abusive toward you too,I bet. But it is true that if you don't at least TRY to help,you are almost as much at fault. I feel so sorry for little kids who are abused in any way.
    kerp1960

    Answer by kerp1960 at 4:00 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I would try to lead by example, but ask her how she expects her children to respect her when she treats them the way they do.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 4:15 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • This question reminds me of that show.."What would You Do"?..It depends on the relationship & how close I was to that person
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:22 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

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