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2 Bumps

Do u tell ur kid(s) ur....

problems..? what do u tell them when they see u upset...?

 
nicoleNjeanna

Asked by nicoleNjeanna at 10:05 PM on Nov. 18, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 11 (632 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Absolutely, but only within reason. Children are very receptive, they can pick up on how you're feeling. My daughter and I have dealt with (and will always still be dealing with) the loss of her dad when he was killed by a drunk driver. It's unrealistic to keep all problems of an adult nature from a child. They will clearly know you're lying to them. Children need to learn to deal with problems, pain, worry, anger, and all of those things - they'll learn what we teach them. If we want them to be able to cope effectively, they must see us experiencing problems and coping effectively. Otherwise, they'll just think that those problems never happened in their family Keep the explanations appropriate. My daughter may know when I am upset because I am missing daddy, but I don't go into detail. She may know that we don't have enough money right now for a trip to the zoo, but I'm not going to tell her that there's no money for food
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 1:52 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Yeah, but mine are 26 and 22 and they ARE my problems! LOL!

    Seriously, when they were little, I would try not to, but if they asked, I would usually tell them we were just upset. Everyone gets upset.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 10:09 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • No, they are kids, they do not need to know about adult problems.
    QandA

    Answer by QandA at 10:13 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I tell my children that I am sad, hurt, upset, whatever. I don't go into details, even with my older children, but I do think kids need to know that parents have bad days too so that they don't feel there is something wrong with them if they do. Anger, pain & worry are normal and it's ok for my kids to know that.
    eeyoreplus4

    Answer by eeyoreplus4 at 10:26 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I don't let them see me upset, they would be too young to understand. I will usually just go in another room until I can get it together.
    JeanetteRene

    Answer by JeanetteRene at 10:12 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • Well, my son is a toddler, so he most likely wouldn't understand what I'm saying. But...I do think that he can pick up on what I'm feeling, so I try not to even give off bad energy. And when he's older, I won't burden him with them. Well, he's much older, more of an adult, I might share things like that with him, but not while he's a kid.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 10:16 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • in the event that they see me upset (lets face it, it happens, especially when things happen that you can not control) I reassure them that everything is OK, and that I'm just unhappy about something that happened, not anything that they did.
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 10:17 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

  • I tried not too but sometimes it was hard. Sometimes you just have to make something up and reassure them that you will be okay. Although sometimes, depending on what it is you are upset about, you do need to let them know what is going in a small degree. It takes judgement on your part but is also a part of the learning process of our children about life.
    marchar2002

    Answer by marchar2002 at 10:09 PM on Nov. 18, 2010

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