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3 Bumps

how can i get my 7 yr old not to be nosey?

1st - she is an only child - and i am a single mother ... but my 7 yr old daughter feels like she has the right to put her 2cents on any adult conversation - weather its appropriate or not ... she thinks that her opinion matters no matter what ... I AM TRYING TO TEACH HER WHAT IS AND WHAT IS NOT appropriate to say ... I am ALSO trying to teach her not to repeat what she hears me saying on the phone to others -

i dont know how to handle it .... PLEASE HELP ME STOP THIS

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DOODLES-NAYNAY

Asked by DOODLES-NAYNAY at 2:23 AM on Nov. 19, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 2 (11 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Sounds like you have a really smart girl who has learned to listen to gather information. You need to change some of your behavior on the phone, I mean that nicely, don't say anything around her that should not be repeated. You need to be more careful. Second when you take her out with adult friends, bring something along for her to do to distract her and keep her busy. You might also have a secret signal for when she is about to have an outburst...like tapping your finger to your own cheek...which is a signal to her that she is not to speak at that moment, and no one will know you are telling her that. Last, I think she is just pushing your buttons a little too. Perhaps she is a little jealous of the socializing and the attention you give others. Tell her if she sits quietly during the lunch with your friends lets say, then you will do something very special with just her like the movies or a manicure.
    spottedpony

    Answer by spottedpony at 2:40 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Some good advice here and make sure you have special times with her and she is getting the praise and attention she needs. Include her in parts of the conversation when other adults are around so she does not feel left out.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 8:10 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • By not hesitating to include her in some conversations AND not hesitating to tell her in clear terms when she's not welcome in the conversation. ex: Aunt Suzy and I are going to be having a private discussion right now, you can either play outside or you may go read quietly in your room. Make it clear when she's not welcome - and make sure there are times when she is. It really is rude, unnecessary, and intrusive for children to constantly force themselves into the role of center-of-attention.
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 1:43 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • IMO most children are like tape recorders at that age. It can be very embarrassing when they repeat something you don't want to be repeated. I agree that she sounds like a very smart little girl. I think having the conversation about keeping quiet over things heard is a good start, but I also agree you will have to start watching what you say around her. I remember when my kids were young, we were going to grandma's house and when we got there a little girl next door was outside. My husband looked at me and groaned & said I really hate that kid - she's such a brat. My daughter jumped out of the car, ran to the little girl and told her what he said. The girl was devastated, my husband was embarrassed and my daughter had no idea what just happened. My husband NEVER said anything about anyone in front of the kids again! Good Luck to you mom!
    MomIWant

    Answer by MomIWant at 7:48 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • My son can be a bit nosy at times as well, I just tell him that something is not his business, or he doesn't get a vote, or that he is being rude by eavesdropping and he needs to stop it unless he wants people to do it to him.
    KTMOM

    Answer by KTMOM at 8:27 AM on Nov. 20, 2010

  • Most of the problem is that she is an only child and she is probably around adults most of the time, who she feels to be her peers. Her opinions are important to her and she feels as if she is contributing to the conversation. Don't discourage her from making her own contribution to a conversation, because in doing so, you are essentially telling her that what she has to say is not important. My daughter is also an only child and spends a lot of time with adults. As a result, she is more mature and responsible than most of her friends.

    Let her know what topics are off limits and watch your own language around her. If you do not want her speaking up when you are out with other adults, hire a sitter so that you can have adult conversations without worrying about her.
    neebug3766

    Answer by neebug3766 at 1:13 AM on Nov. 21, 2010

  • my dd is 5 and i have the same problem.
    tonyalynn

    Answer by tonyalynn at 11:05 AM on Nov. 21, 2010

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