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2 Bumps

Why is it so wrong for a married man to have friends who are female?

But no one questions a married females motives if she has a male friend.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:24 AM on Nov. 19, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • There isn't. I couldn't ever be with another person who automatically accused every time they saw me with someone of the opposite sex- BTW, that is totally a 2 way street. Men accuse women even more than we accuse men!

    If I couldn't trust my SO, we wouldn't have a relationship. People's own insecurities and delusions are what come between them.
    ObbyDobbie

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 8:39 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Actually neither me nor DH have "friends" of the opposite sex. Just not something we find ok. I mean we have spouses of friends who we are friends with, but no one we would like go hang out with or call or anything. We usually all hang out together. We trust each other and are both secure in our marriage, it is just not something we find acceptable for us.
    RheaF

    Answer by RheaF at 9:03 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • I don't think it's wrong, my DH has friends that are female. Some people are very insecure, or their DH's have cheated on them, etc. giving them some reason to question any relationship their husbands have with a female. BTW - my ex questioned me about every male friend/coworker I had when we were married, even though I had never given him any reason to question me. Insecurity/jealousy isn't limited to just the women!
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 8:29 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Neither is wrong
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:05 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • i dont see anything wrong with it. when your committed to someone you have to have trust, if the trust isnt there then theres no relationship. I would HOPE my guy has friends male and female that he can go to with things or even just hang out.
    Luckybear05

    Answer by Luckybear05 at 1:32 AM on Nov. 20, 2010

  • I don't think there is anything wrong, as long as there is trust it should not be a problem.
    older

    Answer by older at 8:30 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • In the best circumstances we are only trusting to ourselves. We are really just for ourselves. In a full spectrum sort of attitude, I've never seen anyone live ''for'' another person and be happy for themselves or content. What this equals is this---if someone said that you can't please them any time, any way, for any reason, and they aren't happy, .....(trust or not) then it's not you that controls that. Let's say you cheated "so -to- speak", ...it's not even cheating on them, as much as you have learned to ruin your own trust for life. WE ONLY use our spouses for excuses to keep our self from the world. It's true ! What if you weren't married, never with anyone, or virgin. You'd never care. You wouldn't worry about this whatsoever.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:05 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Absolutely! It's wrong on both ends! Married men tend to start feeling like they've settled at some point and are no longer masculine enough because they aren't on the hunt anymore so they will jump on the first thing that wags their tail or a "friend" that might be going through a "thing" with her man turn to her friend (your husband) and is vulnerable and wahla..."opps honey, I fell and my penis just so happened to have ended up in her vagina...several times."
    ShouldHaveLeft

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 9:23 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • There is nothing wrong with it. Hub and I both have friends of the opposite sex.
    Zakysmommy

    Answer by Zakysmommy at 9:29 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • This is a very touchly subject ...secure or not a close relationship with the opposites sex is playing with fire when you are married
    unless you're doing things together as couple and not hanging out alone together its not right, because sexual attraction starts in the mind before it becomes physical and this then opens a door you do not want to go though .Don't be to comfortable with their relationship and keep your eyes and ears open.
    scaredtotrust

    Answer by scaredtotrust at 10:12 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

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