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Please help

I am a financial disaster! I cannot for the life of me budget my money. If you give me a dollar, I will spend a dollar and a dime. I am lucky my DH is very good with money, but it is not fair to him that I am such a complete irresponsible mess. I mean, what if he died tomorrow? He has to worry that his kids would be homeless becasue I over spend and put off paying bills.
Here is where I need help. I admit I have the problem. I think some may stem from the 4 yrs I was a single mom with no child support. I would put the utilities and rent off, in case we needed food, gas, clothes etc. I know it makes no sense to you all , but that is the way I looked at it. I need help on how to address this problem. Why do I behave this way? It is not just I am rude, I think there is a deep seeded issue I cannot name and need to deal with. I need to turn over my debit card to him, let him cash my check, and put me on a budget.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:08 AM on Nov. 19, 2010 in Money & Work

This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • Maybe that's just how you are. We all have are whatever that we would like to change or should change, but for some reason you just can't get that one thing together. I would try just to make a few simple changes or improvements on it. I think you are trying to keep yourself in check by the things you are doing. Don't be so hard on yourself, nobody is perfect. I hope this at least made you feel a little better:)

    Shines3

    Answer by Shines3 at 10:22 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • 2 words~ DAVE RAMSEY!! Get his book, go to his seminar it will help a ton!!!
    ria7

    Answer by ria7 at 10:11 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Check out Dave ramseys program. There is also a support Dave ramsey support group here on CM.
    Candi1024

    Answer by Candi1024 at 10:11 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • jewjewbee, that's true. If you are truely determined to spend noone can help. But Dave does offer some good methods of getting yourself under control. For example, only use cash. Cut up the credit cards and leave the debit card at home. Using only cash will put a limit on what you are able to spend.
    Candi1024

    Answer by Candi1024 at 10:19 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • I would make an appointment with a financial planner
    peanutsmommy1

    Answer by peanutsmommy1 at 10:10 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Why do I behave this way?
    -----
    because you can, and because you want to.
    dave ramsey isn't going to help anyone who WANTS to spend.
    jewjewbee

    Answer by jewjewbee at 10:15 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • You don't need to spend money, it is a addiction...

    I have been like that, I think I will do it next time because i need this and that... Hun, you need to speak to a therapist, why are you spending money you don't have, or should put away...

    Unfortunately a financial planner can't help you, you need to find out what it does too you too spend. Now, I pay the bills, save, because I saw my self in the future with nothing... The kids have enough, and I learned to pack lunches, snacks, and even if we want to go to the movies, we do matane, and bring candy but that is treat...
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 10:24 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Stop spending, get only necessities, and buy those when they are on sale. Before you buy something, ask yourself if you truly need it or is it something you can live without. Don't give yourself excuses. As far as rent and utilities, will it matter if you have a ton of food and clothes if you have nowhere to put them, no electricity to keep the fridge cold? Pay the bills, and if you're worried that you'll run out of money, then you need to save some, even if it's a meesley $10 or $20 a month. And I agree with getting rid of the credit cards, interest rates are ridiculous, if you buy something on sale with a credit card, you may as well have purchase it for the original price or more after paying the credit card interest/fees.
    momov4kids

    Answer by momov4kids at 10:30 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Well, I have gone to my DH told him I was sorry for all his worry, and told him I admit I have a problem, admit I am unfair to him also. I have no credit cards just one debit card. I gave him that and the check book. I don't have tons of clothes etc. But I do put househould items before the bigger bills, and YES I know this makes no sense since they are pointless if I have no house! I think therapy may be in order to discover why I feel the need to behave this way.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:42 AM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Well, the first step to solving a problem is admitting you have one. You might want to take a finance class at the local community college or seek counceling.
    HotMama330

    Answer by HotMama330 at 10:49 AM on Nov. 19, 2010