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Should I feel guilty?

I got "knocked up" at a young age... 21 (not so young anymore, I guess). I got very lucky to have been with an amazing man, and we did marry before our amazing little boy got here, and we're happily married now and our son is 16 months old. I have nothing to complain about, our lives are great! But sometimes I think about what life would have been like if we would have been able to enjoy dating a little longer, and being newlyweds and having a real honeymoon! I see other people my age, and I'm envious of the lifestyles of being able to "wing it" or hanging out with friends and staying out late. I miss my pre-mommy body too, lol... probably the most!! I wouldn't trade any of that for my son, he is the best thing for both my husband and I, and to think we made him together! But... I can't be the only one who misses the days of being irresponsible...

 
1st_time_mom23

Asked by 1st_time_mom23 at 12:09 PM on Nov. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (741 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • Yeah, you sometimes miss the fun or crazy things you did before you had all the added responsibilities. It's natural. But just keep it in perspective.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 12:13 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • I think its natural, just don't go all crazy and act on it. Everyone wonders things at some point, the trick is just not to do it.
    bjojola

    Answer by bjojola at 12:18 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • I had my first son at 22 I am now 42 they do get more independent and you will get some parts of your life back. Don't look back only forward.
    christinato

    Answer by christinato at 12:20 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Same here I was 21 when I got prego and married at 23. I see all my friends being crazy and doing wild things...and I know they want what I got a best friend lover a husband and my childs father all in one. I have a date for every occasion someone to yell at and to catch me when I fall.
    Maybe their Friday nights are more fun but I cut to the chase. And I can do all that stuff when I retire lol
    elyssek832

    Answer by elyssek832 at 12:21 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • I am a single mom and my daugter is 3 and I felt the same way in the beginning but now I am enjoying life and my daughter as though I never had a past....I am having more fun now then I was when I was not a mother. I am 24 and I still go out once a month and take trips with my daughter.....I did not put everything in my life on hold I just put it to the side until I got to where I wanna be....Here is a suggestion....Maybe once a month or once every 3 months you and your husband have someone keep your son overnite and go out and stay out all nite....
    mom42107

    Answer by mom42107 at 12:26 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Everything happens for a reason and God gave you your child for a reason. Maybe your lifestyle was too wild and crazy and your child has grounded you and made you a better person. I was never a partyer. I got married at 19 and had my son at 23. I still see my friends atleast every other week bc others are happy to give you the night off every once in a while. The body is not back like I want, but everything has changed. Try to stay positive and be thankful. It is hard sometime I know, but I would not change anything even through the hard times.
    meg4763

    Answer by meg4763 at 12:41 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • One day I read a comment that it got in my head and I think it is very true. She said "that the grass is always greener on the other side" I know you miss those days where you just want to be with friends and do other things but at the same time you said you are happy with what you have now. It could have been worse, being all by yourself taking care of your baby.

    I would make arrangements to have a friends night out once in a while or just mommy time. Best wishes.
    bratgirln1

    Answer by bratgirln1 at 12:47 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Oh, and you should feel guilty, there is nothing wrong with thatgood

    bratgirln1

    Answer by bratgirln1 at 12:48 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • It's normal. I had a baby at 19 and 21. I'm now 22 but I'm done with children. I do sometimes think about how my life was before kids and miss the crazy side I had. I miss the carefree lifestyle here and there but then I look at my children and know I would never trade them for anything. I believe things happen for a reason. I was on BC when I conceived both of them. (I'm married to their father) So I believe that were meant to happen and help be straighten my life and make me more responsible.
    mommy_of_two388

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 1:53 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • im not married & i miss going out with my friends & having a girls night out & i miss my body to
    Ricanmami1

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 10:25 PM on Nov. 19, 2010