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I caught my husband masturbating adult content

Hes been ignoring me off and on and every time i try to initiate sx he would seem uninterested. When I caught him he was so defensive with his words and blamed me for the reason y hes not doing it . says im always mad at him which is true but in the past we always did it and then we forgot about fighting. I dont know what to do, if i should throw away 4 years of marriage... i always had a feeling he was doing that but i guess i didnt ever want to catch him... he also denies other times and says this was the only time ...right.. its not the fact that hes masturbating its the reasons behind it,, hurts too much that he neglects me

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:11 PM on Nov. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Sounds like you might need marriage counseling.

    Why are you always mad at him?

    Answer by ARmom at 4:15 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • If you are going to throw away 4 years of marriage because he is masturbating then you have more problems than that going on. All ok most all men masturbate, it is just the way life goes. Deal with it and get on to more important things in life.

    Answer by tony1638 at 4:15 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • I wouldn't leave for that reason. I think that with time and understanding it'll hopefully work out in the future. I'm not sure what kind of temperament your DH has but is he's one to calm down and can talk, I would tell him how you feel. Not so much about the masturbation but more about how your feeling neglected and how you want him.


    Answer by Jenaiko01 at 4:16 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • My thoughts on what you have shared.

    1 If he was always mad at you (and admittedly so) would you want to have sex with him? Would that be a turn on? Would that make you feel loved and wanted?

    2 When you have approached him/try to initiate sex, how did you go about it? Was it overt or was it subtle?

    3 In the past, you guys may have had sex and forgot about fighting. However, that most likely did not solve the issues you were origninally fighting about. So the probability of resentments/ill feelings from all of those fights, are present in your relationship. And if they are, they are most likely festering and slowly poisening your relationship.

    When you talked to him about this issues in which you have been mad at him, how were they addressed and resolved?
    You've been married 4 years, if this is bothering you this much, enough to ask if you should walk away.. I would dare say that you have other issues as well

    Answer by pixie_trix at 4:17 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • I agree with ALL the ladies above. I couldn't have said it better myself.

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 4:47 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • I wouldn't want to habe sex if my husband was always mad at me either.
    Maybe try being nice to him.

    Answer by gulfcoastmom4 at 5:49 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

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