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i have been with my bf for 6 1/2 yrs and we have a 3 yr old kiddo together, but i no longer want to be with him..he treats me like crap and i want to move back with my plan is to slowly start moving my stuff and my kid's stuff, but i start to feel overwhelmed with the fact that i'm the one who has to do this (the break up)..i just dont know how to handle it all...

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Asked by Anonymous at 4:36 PM on Nov. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • When I glanced at your question I though it said you had been breastfeeding for 6.5 years! Hon... change is scary! You know you are doing the right thing, but it doesn't make it easy. My advice is keep plodding along. Don't make or have any deep conversation with him or decision late at night. Those don't go well. Decisions then should hold until the morning and you are better rested. Sorry, I don't have any better advice.

    Answer by Jambo4 at 4:40 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • Tell yourself "It's either move out or be miserable." That's your only choice. So either you pack up and head out or you stay and be with a man who treats you horribly and makes you miserable.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 4:46 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • the other hard part is the fact that he is not on our apt lease so i have to trust he will keep up with the rent, but he really doesn't have anywhere else to go right now and i will keep my key so i can check on the apt to make sure he hasnt' trashed i want our kid to have a place to sleep

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:02 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • It's scary, but if you are confident in your decision, then you just have to have faith that it is right. You should go talk to your apartment manager and explain the situation to them. Does he have good enough credit to be on the lease? Sometimes they will allow a transfer. When I moved out of my sister's apartment, we were both on the lease, and we both had to sign a paper saying I was moving and no longer to be held responsible. Doesn't hurt to ask if there is anything they can do to help. Or you can ask them to keep note on your file that if your rent is late to notify you immediately, so it doesn't get so passed due it ruins your credit.
    My other suggestion would be to just rent a uhaul and move everything at once. Moving things slowly makes it harder and gives you too much time to think and become overwhelmed.
    Good luck! I know it's hard, but just be confident in yourself and your decisions :)

    Answer by CJM_SHM at 5:38 PM on Nov. 19, 2010

  • If you have somewhere else to stay with so you can get out of this relationship, by all means, get out while you can. Make a list of the things that are yours and how much you think it's worth. If he breaks it or throws it away. Take him to court to recover what you have to. Take pictures too. You don't need to be treated bad, neither does your child. It might be a good idea to tell your landlord your situation. That way if any damages are done they can go after him instead of you. BTW...take all of your necessities that you need so you don't have to be going back and forth getting things you need. You can always bring a friend or two to help you get the rest of your stuff.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 1:08 AM on Nov. 20, 2010

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