Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

What would u tell them?

My grown dd,her DS and their dd,my GD came over the other nite wanting to bring a new release movie to watch with us and her little brothers.I said great that I had some premade hamburger patties we could cook too.When they came over We weren't that hungry My ds and sons so I told her go make ur family one.She knows how I hate a dirty unwashed dishes and don't own a dishwasher neway.So its a constant to keep kitchen clean.and I try to stay on top of it always!dishes r a big arguement here b/c no one but me will touch the ktchen even when its their mess but me.and I clean everything.Sorry! To the point.We r never selfish with our grownup kids either if they r hungry and we have it,eat!!!But when they eat here, even uninvited,she and he will go through every cabinet and eat or cook anything they see they want.That's really not the deal,its that they mess up dishes, leave things out and never bother to clean at least their and dds mess up,and when she leaves says sorry I left u a mess Mom!Knowing more than anything that I hate dirty dishes and that I already gripe at the ones still home that won't wash a dish either.but she don't live here anymore,and is almost 26 yrs old and still comes over and messes and my gd too now.I think I got it all so long!but dang what's their deal?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on Nov. 20, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Answers (15)
  • Yes I would say something to her... If she is coming & eating you food that is the least she can do is pick up after herself/her family.. and it would not hurt to go a lil' extra & maybe sweep or whatever to help you out since she is eating your food. Im sure you dont, my mom could care less who go to her house & eats.. make yourself at home.. but dont get so comfortable you leave the play destroyed. KWIM?


    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 3:25 PM on Nov. 20, 2010

  • Say something, she's not a mind reader. If you don't address it she won't know that it bothers you.

    Answer by tracylynnr67 at 3:47 PM on Nov. 20, 2010

  • Don't need to read minds,when Like I said,she's been told and knows this of me.Like I'd go to her house eat,mess and leave.What's wrong with this age anymore with Parents its never about eating,They know they can come to Mamas and eat.Its the dang messyness everytime left for me.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:05 PM on Nov. 20, 2010

  • if she can't clan up the mess- she can't eat at your house anymore...
    that's what I'd tell her!

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 5:49 PM on Nov. 20, 2010

  • clan=clean

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 5:49 PM on Nov. 20, 2010

  • I wouldn't tolerate this. Set your boundaries so this doesn't happen again.

    Answer by twinkletoes0408 at 7:40 PM on Nov. 20, 2010

  • Say something!

    Answer by shanapiv at 12:55 AM on Nov. 21, 2010

  • They are lazy & take advantage of you. Tell her she is NOT allowed in your kitchen again & she can't eat there, either! They are so selfish, I know-I have one! I think we created them that way, though & now it is so hard to break them out of it. Best of luck, Hon!

    Answer by NicolesMommy at 12:56 AM on Nov. 21, 2010

  • Then say something again. Tell her she cannot cook anything at your house, let her know that your food is off limits, etc.. What's wrong with the young people today is that they are allowed to do things even when they have been told that it upsets their parents. My sons come to visit (they are 18, 20, 22 and 24) and we have family supper twice a week. They help to clean up after supper, they don't make messes in our home. It's not their home any more and they know that if they leave a mess I am going to be the one cleaning it up and they respect me enough to not want to give me the extra work. Your adult child needs to respect you and to teach that to her children. Talk to your daughter, tell her again how this makes you feel.

    Answer by tracylynnr67 at 1:58 AM on Nov. 21, 2010

  • You got to tell her and fix the problem.

    Answer by older at 8:34 AM on Nov. 21, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.