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in need of some good advice....understanding people only...

I have just found out that i am pregnant with my second child. I feel nervous to tell my husband, im kinda scared of his reaction. With our first when we werent married hae asked if ide get an abortion and we have talked since being married if I was to ever get pregnant he says he would want me not to go through with keeping our baby... I feel awful. I feel alone and I am scared he will freak out and yell and tell to get rid of it.. I dont know what to do. My DH is not abusive or violent in any way by the way. He has been an excellent father and a loving husband. We are young still trying to finish Grad school. Iam so scared! I will be keeping the baby of course, but I dont want to tell my husband, but Im starting to show at 3 months! any real good advice, what should I do? mmmm Im going to cry thats it. thank you

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:51 PM on Nov. 4, 2008 in Pregnancy

Answers (9)
  • i would sit down with him and tell him how you feel and you are going to keep the baby if you loves you enough he would agree i dont know what else to say good luck
    wendy232425

    Answer by wendy232425 at 6:56 PM on Nov. 4, 2008

  • I am so sorry. This should be such an exciting time. How long has it been since you talked about not keeping the baby if you have another? Maybe he has changed his mind since being a dad?
    My dh didn't really have an opinion on whether or not to keep a baby before we had our son. Now he would never voluntarily give up one of his children, even before he has "officially" met them. Fatherhood can have a tremendous impact on men. I am sorry I don't have any really great advice. My only thought is that you can try and talk to him. Has he not suspected anything with you not having periods for the last 3 months? I wish you the best. If you ever want to talk, I try to be a good listener.
    reflect1light

    Answer by reflect1light at 7:00 PM on Nov. 4, 2008

  • He has said these things about not wanting a baby and to have an abortion if I was to be pregnant again very recently. Yes he has suspected my not having a period, but he says youll sart. your are not preg. He wants to support his family but its happening faster than we had planned, we couldnt afford to have another but i know we would survie. He gets very angry about this topic.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:10 PM on Nov. 4, 2008

  • why wasn't u on birth control or maybe he should have gotton fixed if he didn't want another one. How long is it till your not allowed to abort a baby?? Like 3, 4 ,5 mths????? I don't even know. I don't like that idea about abortion. So when u find out whats the border line about being able to abort the baby, then tell him cause then he can't say nothing. You shouln;t be showing till like 4 1/2 mths usually even being skinny, cause I'm skinny but a healthy weight. Are you working?? If not you could find a sit down job and same some money back for the baby.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:30 PM on Nov. 4, 2008

  • If his only reason is not being able to afford another baby, then the fact is that there is never a really convenient time for kids and never extra money to have a baby... you just adjust to it.
    reflect1light

    Answer by reflect1light at 8:21 PM on Nov. 4, 2008

  • yes I am on BC, but i miss pills often sometimes, not alot at once, just 1 here 1 there. No not working, hes in Grad school and I am a sahm doing online school through a University. A job is out of the Q until my daughter is in school.. He should get fixed! lol!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:37 PM on Nov. 4, 2008

  • I got pregnant ON the pill without EVER missing one (in eleven years!!) You can't get an abortion past 24 wks unless medically necessary. Just sit him down and talk to him. He'll prob be angry at first, but he'll get over it!
    babyruby02

    Answer by babyruby02 at 10:57 AM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • I GOT PREGNANT THREE TIMES ON THE PILL AND THE SHOT.BUT ANY WAY I'M A YOUNG PARENT AND SO IS MY HUBBY. WERE 22 YEARS OLD AND WE GOT THREE AND ONE ON
    THE WAY.THE FIRST THREE WAS NOT PLAN CAUSE I WAS ON BIRTH CONTROL,BUT THIS BABY WAS PLAN.I DON'T THINK HE WILL ASK YOU TO DO THAT KNOWING THAT HE HAS A
    CHILD WITH YOU ALL READY AND YOUR MARRIED.YOU HAVE TO TALK WITH YOUR HUSBAND AND TELL HIM
    HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YALLS BABY.I WAS 15,17,21 WHEN I GOT PREGNANT AND MY HUBBY
    GOT THREW SHCOOL,HELD DOWN A JOB AND HAD THREE KIDS TO FEED TOO.SO DONT THINK YALL CANT DO IT AND WERE NOT GETTING ANY HELP WITH THE STATE.WERE DOING IT ALL OUR OWN.I DON'T KNOW HOW OLD YALL ARE,BUT IF WE CAN DO IT YALL CAN TOO.
    BUT PLEASE DONT GET AN ABORTION,GIVE THE BABY TO SOME ONE THAT WANT ONE IF YALL DONT WHAT TO GO THROUGH WITH IT,BUT I HOPE YOU DO. HOPE IT TURNS OUT GOOD!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:00 PM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • omg this is so sad I applaud you for keeping the baby. I trust you have told him already since you posted this 2 months ago so I guess it's too late to offer my advice but how did it go?
    punkrockmom153

    Answer by punkrockmom153 at 12:19 AM on Feb. 1, 2009

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