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My husband and I are raising 3 children, one with autism. We are always very stressed and have poor communication skills. Every time I try to discuss any confrontational issues he just says I complain all the time. Can you help?

He is a part time musician and goes out of town alot while I have the kids and his mother (who lives with us also). I do my share of complaining but no more than any other sane person in my situation. When I am at work and he has the household for more than a couple of hours he acts very resentful towards me. When I try to talk about it he is defensive and angry. He has sleep apnea also but doesn't sleep with the c-pap machine like he is supposed to. I desperately want to avoid being the 8 out of 10 marriages that end in divorce with children with special needs but I am afraid we are growing apart due to all of the stress here. Please help, I love my family and don't want to lose them.

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lf3

Asked by lf3 at 9:51 PM on Nov. 4, 2008 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • wow you have a handful. would he be willing to get therapy to help you both work out your issues. the therapist would be able to have both your points of view shown to each other without it looking harsh and he would be more receptive. maybe you could get more help to give all the adults time to regain the energy to keep going.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 9:55 PM on Nov. 4, 2008

  • I'm sorry you're going through a tough time. There is no shame in counseling, even perfectly healthy marriages could use a sounding board sometimes!
    KatieCrandall

    Answer by KatieCrandall at 10:00 PM on Nov. 4, 2008

  • Check out your area & find a marriage counselor that is perfect for you & your husband. There are many choices to choose from so find one that is right for the two of you. My husband & I have a great relationship but we still needed tools to use to make it a "lasting relationship". When I married my husband I also became a step parent & so these where changes for both of us. Get help on learning better communication skills with one another. There's no harm in learning more about one another.

    onespecialmom

    Answer by onespecialmom at 12:09 AM on Nov. 5, 2008

  • I'd suggest the two of you get a babysitter and go see the movie "Fireproof". Also, purchase the book "The Love Dare" and start reading the day AFTER you see the movie!

    My prayers are with you!
    BusyMom5x

    Answer by BusyMom5x at 1:03 AM on Nov. 5, 2008

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