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2 Bumps

How would you handle this? Closet homosexual.

Hypothetically. You are pretty sure your brother or son is a closet homosexual, like 99.9% because you caught him in a weird situation with a man, and you're totally okay and accepting, but his dad is an absolute gay hater. The father/son relationship is pretty close and you're sure the father would disown him if he knew.

Would you get involved? Would you urge him to tell his dad or keep it a secret? Would you be there for your brother/son?

 
Shanna84

Asked by Shanna84 at 11:21 AM on Nov. 23, 2010 in Relationships

Level 24 (18,695 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (14)
  • Hubs cousin is a lesbian, cousin's grandpa was totally against homosexuality- he would have been very verbal about his views on it and he would have disowned her. She waited until after he died to 'come out' about it. Some of the family knew (but chose not to tell the grandpa). In the case you describe, I would let my child know that I want him/her to be happy, and if they are homosexual that would change nothing between us, I would still love him/her. As for telling the dad, I would leave that up to my child and I would stay out of it.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 11:31 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I have a cousin like this, he is just coming out now that his mom has died. I would be supportive and let him make the decision to come out or not.

    bjojola

    Answer by bjojola at 11:23 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I would be there for him and let him make the choice to tell dear ol' dad.
    luvmygrlz

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 11:23 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • Do not get involved. He will tell whomever he wants on his timeframe. It's his secret to tell and no one elses to ruin his life for it.
    ShouldHaveLeft

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 11:23 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • All you can do is be there for him if he wants to talk about it and keep it secret.
    sweet29mom

    Answer by sweet29mom at 11:24 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I wouldn't urge him to do anything, I'd just be there for him.
    chocolatluver

    Answer by chocolatluver at 11:24 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • His sexuality is none of my business.
    ballewal

    Answer by ballewal at 11:24 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • If he approached me regarding it I would be supportive. I would not initiate the conversation. I would also stay the heck out of it until he decided he needed to come out. If family or friends became haters I would do what I could to defend and support him.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 11:27 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • If you think this and feel that you NEED to address it do so in private with this individual. In no situation is it your place to or ANYONE ESLES to expose someones personally life. If this individual is gay than it is his choice to tell andgo about how he wants and who he wants to know. People especially in families think it is ok to invade someones privacy because they are family, BUT IT IS NOT.
    aitson

    Answer by aitson at 11:28 AM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I'd leave it alone. It's his life and when he decides to come out and to who is his choice.
    SpiritedWitch

    Answer by SpiritedWitch at 11:29 AM on Nov. 23, 2010