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What do you think of this situation, is it wrong of me to let it bug me?

My bestfriend died 9 years ago and her daughter is now 16 and son is now 13. About a week after my bestfriend died from cancer my bestfriends husband allready had a new girlfriend, then that summer they got a house together. To make a long story short she abused his kids mentally and at times physically (got arrested for it). This woman talked trash to my bestfriends daughter saying how her dad killed her mom (her mom died of cervical cancer) and how her mom was promiscious (sp). and that she was jelous jelous her mom was dead. While my bestfriends husband was broken up with this woman because she through his daughter down the stairs and punched him in the face and spit on him...they eloped to vegas and told the kids when they got back. Fortunately my bestfriends son doesnt let this bother him because he was so little. But it still hurts his daughter. Going on with the story they finally divorced this March. Right away not even a week later he had a new girlfriend. Shes a really nice woman treated his kids great ! my bestfriends daughter loves her! though shes upset because her father is ditching their first holiday (thanksgiving) without his ex..and instead of being with his kids hes going to his girlfriends familys house (in which havent met his kids yet). Im sorry but the whole situation kills me...and now the whole holiday ditching tears me this wrong of me?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:55 PM on Nov. 23, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Crappy situation, I would be sad too. Good luck and sorry people suck.

    Answer by bjojola at 1:59 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • No poor kids! Why don't you write a journal of wonderful memories of their mother and give it to them? I am sure they would cherish it very much.

    Answer by bjane01 at 1:59 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • It is not wrong of you to have some sympathy for the children whose mom you knew so well. Im sorry it is a painful situation. All you can do is pray for the kids and hope that they (especially the daughter) will eventually find peace with the wrong that was done to her.

    Answer by chanelsparkels at 2:00 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • That is all too much drama, no wonder you are stressed out!

    Answer by tasches at 2:23 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I would try to be there for the kids as much as you can. Can you let them know they can email or call or come to you any time about anything? Can they come to your house for Thanksgiving? It's horrible that their Dad acts this way, and I am sure he has been thru his own personal hell with losing a wife, but it's got to be so hard on the kids. You can't change him, all you can do is offer as much love and support as you are able to give and pray for the best.

    Answer by MaryMW at 2:23 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • It's not wrong to care

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:55 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I'm thinking he is a little too quick to move on. Did he ever seem like the unfaithful type?

    Answer by wenona_mandy at 4:01 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • Nope you want the best for your friends kids and seem to be looking out for them...sad situation can you invite them to your own gathernig?

    Answer by rebeccadac at 4:37 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • They will be going to their grandmothers but they just wanted to be with their dad on thanksgiving for the first time since their mom passed...and yes their has been MANY suspisions of him being unfaithful to my bestfriend being that the woman he started seeing a week later was at my bestfriends funeral...

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:19 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I remember when my aunt passed. It wasn't even a month and my uncle was remarried. Their children were grown and were devastated, I can't imagine how these young children felt! It is not wrong of you to care for the children of someone who meant so much to you! And if you have a relationship with the father maybe you could talk to him on the children's behalf. He needs to know how much these children are hurting, once from the death of their mother and then from the abuse! I also agree with a pp, if they can, let them spend the holiday with you.

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 5:27 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

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