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2 Bumps

i just dont get it!!!!!!!!!!..............(warning long)

ok so a couple months ago my mother in law and my father in law said we can stay with them in washington until we could find our own place. so we moved from california to washington. it has been a challenge living here though. i am now 6 months pregnant but i was preg before we got here by like a couple months. so anyways we were all getting along fine for like the first month but after that it went down hill from there. my father in law chooses to pick on me an my son for now reason at all. he bosses me and my husband around like we are his servants and if we dont jump when he says jump because we busy taking care of our three year old son or we are at work and school he decides to take away the television like it is our punishment and the other day he locked out of the house cause he said we slammed the door. mind you it is now snowing in washington. we have like 6 or so inches. and today my son was watching television and he knows my son needs a warning before a transition of any sort but he goes in there and changes it without even saying a word. now i know my son is three and you shouldnt have to tell a three year old anything before you do it but my son is a little different he has special needs. so he changes it and says oh well go watch it in your room. he didnt even say sorry when he hurt his feelings. he is always doing stuff like that to hurt his feels. like he is very attached to his grandma and if his grandma says he has to leave the room for a minute so she can change then he can come back in his gpa will intentionally lock him out when she says he can go back in. also they have birds that sit next to the couch and poop and stuff on them but he says we cant lay on them because it will ruin the couch. i dont know he just has to yell at klay for everything he can think of and he does the same to me. but he doesnt do it very often if my mother in law is around or if my husband is around. he even yells at my husband. if my father in law and my mother in law have an arguement we get yelled at for it or we get "punished" like getting locked out of the house or he will take the coffee away even if we bought it, or he will take the remote to the t.v. i dont get it he seems to think it is ok to pick on a three year old and he dont even know me really well or even try to get to know me. if my mother in law say something to him he will act all nice around her and then mean still behind her back or he will act nice for awhile then go back to the same shit. i what would you do????? we are trying to get our own place and we do everything asked of us. we might have our own place but i want to get along with everyone and not have holidays be wierd. how do you deal with that? i dont even want him around my kid and then i am about to have another one and i dont want him around her either. my son has gotten to where if anyone raises there voice even a little bit he covers his ears. even if we are yelling at the dogs for something. he mostly does it when his grandpa raises his voice.
i dont know what to do! what would you do?? i know it is his house but he wants us to respect him and i get that but you dont just get respect with out giving it too. right?
please help! i dont know what to do!

 
19_klayton

Asked by 19_klayton at 2:13 PM on Nov. 23, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (49 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Start looking for a new place to live asap.
    tasches

    Answer by tasches at 2:21 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • It sucks living with people. Hang in there, focus on your kids, and this will all be over when you get your new place.
    keisha613

    Answer by keisha613 at 2:18 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • How long does it take to save up and get your own place? That sounds like the thing to do
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:45 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • Start counseling your son immediately. Help him to find a healthy way to deal with this emotional and verbal abuse. You don't want any lasting effects for him. Then, seriously limit the time you spend with that man. If you get along with your MIL, arange outings with her but not FIL, etc. Limit visits with FIL to their house or public places so you can leave when he turns into an ass.

    Sorry you're all having to deal with this. I hope you have your own place soon.
    DivaDynamite

    Answer by DivaDynamite at 9:54 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • i would keep my eye on my sonat all times. if he can do that, who knows what else he can do to him? It sucks living with people and my advice would be, to find a new place asap and let your hubby know whats going on.
    CandieGirl09

    Answer by CandieGirl09 at 2:29 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • Start making preparations to get your own place.
    joysweet

    Answer by joysweet at 6:07 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • Honey I couldn't get through all of it-sorry -it was long, but sounds like you need to get your own place
    aitson

    Answer by aitson at 9:43 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I understand how it is with your ds! People don't understand when you work so hard to find something that works and prevents an upset and others just blow it off! In a situation like this I think the only solution is to move out. People like your FIL don't change, he wants to be "boss" and he'll do whatever he can to get his way. Perhaps if you live in another home you can help him build an appropriate relationship with your children. I also feel that if you try to talk to him about his behavior (which I normally would advise) I think he would escalate the behavior and you would be even more miserable. Just try to move as soon as possible, and hopefully you can leave without any hard feelings, just hold your tongue and pack quickly lol.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 1:35 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

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