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5 Bumps

is this inappropriate?

This has been festering in my mind
the other day my bio-father came over and was playing with my son.

please take a minute to suck, like a vaccuum, with your mouth on your arm, no tongue, almost like your a human vacuum.

He was doing that to my son, but on my sons chest, my son is a tot and he was laughing and I thought he was blowing, you know like trying to do the fart noises, but then I realized what he was actually doing.

Is this wrong? for some reason it has been bothering me. Like grossing me out...I'm like crying cause I don't know if that was just play, or like some sort of pedophilia crap.


Asked by Anonymous at 2:46 PM on Nov. 23, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Either way, take this as a warning: watch your children 100% of the time that other people are with them because sometimes you are being tested and seduced exactly the same way your children will be.

    Do not lose track of your gut feelings, even if it's 'silly' or 'it's fine because it's him'...You don't need to do anything special --just never forget that building trust is 100% of any pedophile's goal with parents.

    Answer by LindaClement at 2:53 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I think he was just playing. But I think when anyone puts their mouth on a child it is disgusting. One time a cousin of mine was taking my son's hands and putting them in his mouth! I was so grossed out. It doesn't sound sexual to me though.

    Answer by mompam at 2:49 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I always say, listen to your gut! If you feel disturbed by that action, there very well could be a reason and don't ignore your instincts! And don't leave him alone with your child either until that feeling goes away. You have to be your child's advocate and protection, it is all he has in the world! I would just tell the father that you felt uncomfortable with that type of play, and maybe give him some suggestions of ways he can make your son laugh that make you comfortable. Father might have been just having fun but....listen to your gut, mother knows best I say!

    Answer by spottedpony at 2:51 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • Trust your gut. Sounds weird to me.

    Answer by Mme.Langley at 3:06 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • IMHO it sounds innocent. However, you should always always follow your gut.

    Answer by hibbingmom at 3:23 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • the more I try to demonstrate on myself, what he was doing, the more I feel like it was weird. I'm like seriously crying cause I'm like, did I just let some one molest my kid in front of me. And I'm afraid to tell my dh because my bio dad lives down the street, he will put himself in prison, I swear he will try to kill him if I even think anything was weird.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:49 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • I honestly think he was looking at my son weird. I don't want him here ever again. My instincts are usually right. I even remember at one point I was just letting my son run around in a onsie, and I was putting my sons pants on him and he was like "NOoooooo" kind of under his breath....I'm just going to have to discuss this with my husband, I'm getting so MAD RIGHT NOW....I want to take a bat to his fucking head right now........I'm just sitting here bawling. I know my son thought it was funny, the suck thing, but I the more I think about it the more sick I think he is. I want to fucking Pummel him right fucking now. OMGGGG O, getting so angry right now.

    Something was telling me to not take my eyes off of him and watch his actions.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:56 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • Has he (your Dad) ever did anything in the past to make you think he is a pedophile?  If not why are you thinking he is molesting your son right in front of you?

    I use to blow(making farting sounds) on my DD's bellies and pretend to bite them and they loved it. I was just playing.


    Answer by louise2 at 3:13 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • sorry ladies, I'm typing about this, i know thats odd...but I'm trying to somehow calm myself hubby and I just talked and he's just trying to grasp it right now. I swear, I think I'm going to loose it. Im shaking I'm so mad right now.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:15 PM on Nov. 23, 2010

  • If this is what your gut is telling you then you need to listen. But you also need to calm down so you can think clearly. If there was suspicious behavior yesterday it does not sound like any major damage has been done. Moving forward, you need to remember how you are feeling and of course take precaution. I also wonder if there has ever been anything in the past to indicate pedophilia with your father- if he is a pedophile he has likely not gone this long without incidents although you may not know of them. Do you have siblings or relatives you can ask if they have ever had an issue or heard of any weird behavior? I would definitely look into this further, even speak to your father and see what kind of answers you get, and never let him with your child out of your sight of course. This is very scary, pedophiles are very manipulative, and most people that are molested as children have it done to them by someone they know. GL.

    Answer by MaryMW at 3:30 PM on Nov. 23, 2010