Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

my husband and i have been depress well more me because we want a baby and dont know why i dont get pregnet, we havent really been the same what should we do?? i know he loves me but doesn't know what to say to me when i find out i'm not pregnet... how should we handle this???

we need help, i dont want our relationship to fall................

Answer Question
 
mrs.alcocer

Asked by mrs.alcocer at 12:51 PM on Nov. 24, 2010 in Relationships

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • go to the doctor and have bood work done..there may be a reason why its not happening. have his sperm checked. have you tried using OPKs?
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 12:53 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

  • stop trying so hard.... I heard that and hated hearing it... but we tried for two years for our second.... went to the doctor after a year and they started doing some testing.. Told me I wasn't ovulating. We were on the same roller coaster of excitment and depression. We ended up movingbefore they could finish their testing or get us started with anything. We were so busy with moving we stoped "trying" we even used protection for a couple months (cuz we were living with his parents and didn't want it to happe while there haha). then when is settled down we stopped using protection and a coupld months later... I was holding a positive test in my hand... we were so consumed in it for the first year though I think the stress just made everything worse... have sex for fun again and know it will happen sometime and if not the doctor can help get you there... sorry you have to go through this!
    Mrs.KV

    Answer by Mrs.KV at 12:56 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

  • Go directly to a Reproductive Specialist! Not to a regular Doctor or OBGYN. Go to an expert since after all is said & done that is who you will be referred to after all the others waste your time & money.
    ILovemyPaulie

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 12:57 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

  • Checking yourself out would be a start, but this is the time when you two should be getting closer not growing apart, you both have the same goal. It might be something physical that keeps you two from realizing a dream, and then it might be that fate doesn't have children for you in store just yet, either way, growing apart will make the task more difficult, so try and work it out together.
    older

    Answer by older at 1:02 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

  • Downgrade the importance, in your mind, of having a baby yourself.

    While you're obsessed with the idea that 'if only I got pregnant' as the sole idea that will make you happy, complete you, allow you to grow and mature into the right kind of you, share parentage with your lover, etc, you have constructed (and continue to reinforce) an impenetrable barrier to your own happiness.

    When you get busy doing something else you value highly in your life, whether or not you have children will re-set itself as a point of interest rather than a necessary condition for your happiness. If having children to raise is so very, very important to you, start the process to adopt right now --don't wait, or no one (even you) will believe that it is actually important to you at all.

    If you choose to do nothing at all toward what you say you want, clearly what you want is to be miserable --and I doubt that a lot.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 1:08 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

  • thank yall for the advice, maybe i do wantt this to much even my husband says it...... and linda thank you so much for sharing your opinion with me i really aapreciate it alot... my husband is more stronger then i am and he always helps and guides me i let this get to me. when i cry he cries with me and tells me everything is going to be ok. i think i should just give it a rest for awhile. after all i still got my whole life ahead of me and so does my husband..... thank yall for the advice
    mrs.alcocer

    Comment by mrs.alcocer (original poster) at 1:19 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

  • and no i have not tried opks
    mrs.alcocer

    Comment by mrs.alcocer (original poster) at 1:26 PM on Nov. 24, 2010

  • YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND NEED TO BE OPEN WITH EACHOTHER ON HOW YOU ARE FEELING. I FELL THAT YOU ARE AFRAID BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT GETTING PREGNANT AND YOU PROBLE FEEL LIKE THE PROBLEM IS YOU. I WENT THROUGH IT MYSELF AND IT IS A HARD THING TO DEAL WITH, BUT I HAVE LEARNED THAT ALL THINGS COME IN GOOD TIME. YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND NEED TO SEE A DOCTOR TOGETHER, AND QUIT BLAMING YOUR SELF. JUST REMEBER THAT WOMEN ARE STRONG BEAUTIFUL NUTURING HUMAN BEINGS THAT TRY TOO HARD IN LIFE TO MAKE THINGS PERFECT. LIFE ISN'T PERFECT AND RELATIONSHIPS SHOULD OVER COME THAT INPERFECTION. JUST RELAX AND GET ON THE SAME PAGE AS YOUR HUSBAND BE OPEN ABOUT EVERYTHING INCLUDING YOUR FEARS AND FEELINGS. THINGS WILL COME IN GOOD TIME, AND WITH DOCTORS HELP YOU BOTH CAN MAKE DECISONS TOGETHER. GOD WORKS HIS LITTLE MIRACLES IN MANY WAYS. JUST BE PATIENT WITH WHAT IS BEING DELT WITH YOU AND YOUR HUSBAND. HOPE ALL TURNS OUT FOR THE BEST FOR YOU BOTH.
    carrielynn78

    Answer by carrielynn78 at 3:57 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN