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What are some age apropriate House rules and discipline?

I have a 3 yr old daughter who is vedry hyper and never listens to me. I have a 9 yr old step son who is really really LAZY and acts like a 5 yr old. I have 4 house rules like no yelling and hitting, no lazziness but husband thinks his kids can do no wrong and the house rules are to general. What do you all suggest?

 
Mrs.Norris

Asked by Mrs.Norris at 4:03 AM on Nov. 25, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 13 (1,094 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • The rules are not detailed enough to be followed. Be more specific. Make a chore chart or behavior chart for EACH child. Be SPECIFIC. Not clean room...say, put dirty clothes in hamper, put clean clothes in dresser or closet, put toys in proper places. Put dishes in the sink. No hitting, slapping, punching, yelling or name calling. Take away priveleges, toys, etc and demand respect. Whatever consequences you decide, make sure you follow through.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 10:45 PM on Nov. 25, 2010

  • "no laziness" is extremely vague. what exactly do you mean he's lazy? does he not pick up after himself? are there things that he does that is him just being a nine year old boy? i have a nine year old step son, too, and he has very poor habits because he was spoiled most of his life. it's been a struggle to find ways to get him to take care of himself without getting too frustrated. maybe you are experiencing the same thing. i found that setting a schedule was the most helpful. when he wakes, he makes his bed, goes to the bathroom, makes his breakfast, cleans it up. he has a nightly schedule, too. maybe you can implement specific rules for him, to help foster activity. make it a game. the no hitting or yelling rules are excellent and specific. but your husband's right - no laziness is too vague. remember he's only nine, then set rules to help him out. i hope that helps
    AngryBob

    Answer by AngryBob at 4:44 AM on Nov. 25, 2010

  • I think you need to sit down, all of you and talk about the house rules. It is important to get the kids involved when setting them. I also agree that "no laziness" is to vague. I would say for the 3 year old set up something like a time out system. Let her decorate it and tell her that is her place to go when she needs a little quiet time. If she starts to act up remind her of her spot and take her there. I think you need to be consistant. With the 9 year old give him specific choirs like putting the dishes away, making his bed, or things like that. Listen to him and see what he thinks.

    Also, if you have a no yelling rule, then that means you can't yell either. At least for me I believe we lead by example and if you are yelling and then telling the kids they can't then they may become confused and think well if you can do it so can I.

    Lastly, follow through with punishments!

    Good Luck!
    cornflakegirl3

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 8:29 AM on Nov. 25, 2010

  • maybe the stepson has some form of ADHD? My 11 YO does act like an 8YO. He's got Aspergers and can't really help it.
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 6:02 AM on Nov. 25, 2010