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Religious question...

Is there any one who is LDS (Mormon) or any other scrutinized religion in which you have to deal with your co workers or family's onslaughts and prejudices regarding said religion? If so, how do you handle it? I try to take it in stride but it seems the worst offenders are DH's family. They are constantly either picking on him or laughing at him for making decisions regarding our religion. DH is a convert to the LDS church and his family just teases him constantly and doesn't take him seriously at all. Should I say something to them in an effort to get them to back off, even if it is just a little bit or should I just let my Husband take care of it himself?

 
FirstTimeMom224

Asked by FirstTimeMom224 at 3:39 AM on Nov. 26, 2010 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 11 (551 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • My parents were shocked when I converted to my husband's faith and were contently making rude comments and trying to start fights between my husband and I. The best advice I can give is to stay a united front. Make decisions together and when you are fighting or in a disagreement don't let them see. It has been 4yrs since my conversion and things are getting better. They now longer get angry when we go to church on Sunday mornings (instead of spending time with them) and they even let us say grace at their dinner table! They still make comments and start fights..but not as much. I would avoid conflict and try to win them over with love. If it gets really bad your husband should say something to his parents..so it doesn't appear like you are forcing this on him. It's a hard situation to be in and I will pray for your family.
    tobys.mommy

    Answer by tobys.mommy at 6:42 AM on Nov. 26, 2010

  • Don't get into a big hassle with them - just be direct and to the point. Tell them you were raised to believe that it's rude to make fun of someone else's religion, and that it's also rude to discuss religion or politics in polite company. That will most likely get them to at least shut up about it in front of you, even if they insist on being immature morons in private.
    NotPanicking

    Answer by NotPanicking at 3:42 AM on Nov. 26, 2010

  • Very close friends of mine are Mormons (LDS) and they are very good people. Don't listen to other people when they tease him or laugh.. they just haven't found Jesus.
    AtHomeMommy-3

    Answer by AtHomeMommy-3 at 3:42 AM on Nov. 26, 2010

  • Yes I've dealt with my DH side for years, they would make terrible comments about my faith at the dinner table. After years of trying to let it go I finally said something. It's much better now but we will never be close, I avoid most topics with them, it's hard to talk about neutral topics, like the weather, for hours but that's what I do.

    RyansMom001

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 6:25 AM on Nov. 26, 2010

  • this is me personally, but I've learned (since I don't need to hear it) to just let them believe or hear what they want and I'll do what I want anyways. Its not their business, so to keep conflict and tension down, I just tell em what they wanna hear (if it even comes up).

    Main thing is to avoid the topic to begin with, but if it does, just go with what everyone wants to see/hear and it blows over and everyone's happy and goes about their day in happy ignorance. Pointless conflict avoided.

    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 5:07 AM on Nov. 26, 2010

  • My husband's family thinks we're Scientologists just because they know we're not orthodox Christians and don't care to know what we really are. His mom is constantly "The Bible" this and "the Bible" that with me, knowing I don't believe the same way she does. It drives me crazy. I know they all think I've negatively effected my husband's salvation, that I've taken him off of the "true" path... Which is funny, because I didn't really have anything to do with his new religious opinions. He just saw me studying and digging and he started to do the same, because he was never allowed to question growing up.
    bandgeek521

    Answer by bandgeek521 at 10:31 AM on Nov. 26, 2010

  • Let husband handle his own family
    mrsljamieson

    Answer by mrsljamieson at 1:43 PM on Nov. 26, 2010

  • Well, when I was a kid, it was the Mormons in my neighborhood and in my school who made fun of and teased my sister and me for NOT being Mormon. My mother is still jaded, while I've found it in my heart to forgive. Now, I find myself forgiving people who scrutinize me for being Pagan instead of Christian. It's a cycle. You just have to find it in your heart to forgive them, because they really don't know what to say or how to feel. People are afraid of what they don't understand. This goes for every religion, not just a few.
    _Tam_

    Answer by _Tam_ at 7:20 PM on Nov. 26, 2010

  • Assuming that you married a grown-up man and not a 12-yr.-old boy, leave the reacting up to him. But he might feel supported if you let him know how YOU feel about it. Criticism is often a fear reaction--as is violence. Fear that he is happy without their belief system (this is a common fear of people who criticise my atheism). Fear of losing control over a kid who's turned into an adult with his own path to follow. Fear that his new religion will separate him from their family unit--which, face it, often happens in mormonism. That's how cults like that work. You can only support him and let him handle this situation himself. He cannot grow and mature until he's done that.
    witchqueen

    Answer by witchqueen at 8:42 PM on Nov. 26, 2010

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