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My fiancee refuses to see that his child is NOT sweet n innocent&is becoming a bad influence on mine.Im ready to pack up&leave!!!!

His kid:2 1/2 yrs older,only child,girl,very intelligent.has dad wrapped round her finger.never disciplined. My kid:Only child,girl,very intelligent,has mom wrapped round her finger.disciplined as needed.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:55 AM on Nov. 27, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (8)
  • Sorry to say this, but the bio-kids will always win, he can always find another girlfriend. Thats not a snark, but this is a battle you will lose. I have no doubt you're right and seeing this kid from an outsider's perspective not clouded by emotion.

    I was there one time, too and the kid could do no wrong. But I knew him for what he was. Thankfully he grew into adulthood and moved out before it destroyed my marriage, but I can relate. And I'm telling you from experience, the step parent (in my case)....even more so the girlfriend...will almost always lose to the bio-kid unless its really really obvious the kid was wrong.
    Zoeyis

    Answer by Zoeyis at 11:01 AM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • It sounds to me that you might want to get out before you tie the knot. Good luck!!!
    arenad

    Answer by arenad at 11:08 AM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I don't know it is iffy but if he refused to disipline his child for the right reasons then I may be a serious problem on your hands.
    TawnyMarlow

    Answer by TawnyMarlow at 11:10 AM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • This sounds to me like a recipe for disaster and is not likely to improve with time. You probably should consider that this may not be a match if you are thinking permanence.

    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:12 AM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • If he's a good dad then the bio child will win out over the girlfriend and her kid. Maybe you should cut your losses before you do something stupid, like marrying him.
    ShouldHaveLeft

    Answer by ShouldHaveLeft at 11:33 AM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I agree with ShouldHaveLeft... cut your losses, before you end up being the Evil Stepmother in the situation.
    DazzlednSeattle

    Answer by DazzlednSeattle at 11:42 AM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • While I was not in that situation, my sister was. She had a bf who had 2 kids and the bf thought his little 3yr old boy could do no wrong. Well one day the kid bit my 11yr old - for no reason- and the dad tried to make it out to be my kids fault and he was like "well he is only 3" and refused to punish the kid. My sis was livid that the 'brat' bit my son, and that her bf would not see that his kid was in the wrong, and should be punished for it. She then realized that if she stayed with him the child would be a bone of contention between them and the child would be allowed to run amok and never get consequences. She dumped him and has never regretted it. In fact she is much happier without bf/ the kid and all that drama and chaos.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 1:28 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • THANK YOU LADIES!!! I knew my gut was right....wish it didnt hurt so bad though. Thanks again.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:08 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

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