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Mothers of children with Aspergers...please help me.

We recently started having my 10 year old son tested for ADHD. While he's not overly hyper, he does have focusing problems in school (still manages to make straight A's BUT he can't focus at all, and is bored in general). Also, I might add, he's incredibly intelligent (as I've read many asperger children are). In testing him for ADHD, the center we went to began mentioning aspergers to me because I said he likes science and dinosaurs. When I mentioned that he does a lot of science stuff in his spare time they took the line of questioning in a completely different direction from ADHD. He has other markers, but not many, mostly just the hyper focusing. He has a lot of friends, he doesn't seem socially awkward at all, he can read people's emotions and doesn't lack empathy at all. He is kind of clumsy, doesn't always pick up on jokes, has an extensive vocabulary (including teaching himself the Latin names of just about every animal you or I could name), he didn't however have delayed motor development, he talked from about 8 months on with full sentences by 12 months (no I'm not exaggerating). At the time, him being my only child and my husband and I being quite young, I had no idea that his being more advanced in just about everything was abnormal, lol. He doesn't have any sort of heightened sensitivity, except maybe to his 4 year old sister, lol, but I assume that's normal too. Anyway, is it possible that my son has aspergers with out being socially awkward? Yes, I do think he's a bit immature for his age tho. I'm just so confused by all of this, I don't know if I'm trying not to see something or maybe we should get a 2nd opinion. Thanks for any advice.


Asked by Anonymous at 1:06 PM on Nov. 27, 2010 in Tweens (9-12)

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • My son has Asperger's and though he is socially awkward it's not as much as some. He enjoys playing with other children but needs coaxing on how to get started and he tends to have spacial issues as in being to close or grabbing at clothes and arms and such. The is not 'mind blind' and does not have a lot of trouble reading faces. He does think very literally and he is very clever. He is obsessed with star wars and robots. lol. My son is somewhat 'clumsy' and does have visual motor and fine motor skill delays. He was very nearly diagnoses as PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified) rather than Asperger's. SO even as far as Asperger's goes he is 'mild'. The thing with ANY spectrum disorder is that there is not cookie cutter diagnosis. If you put my son in a room with 5 other kids of his same diagnosis they would all present somewhat differently. There is a book...

    Answer by But_Mommie at 1:12 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • called A Parent's Guide to Asperger's and high Functioning Autism that I highly recommend. Even if he is not given a Spectrum diagnosis it is a very good book for kids who are visual learners with some delays.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 1:13 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • OP here.... cont....He also doesn't always make eye contact when he's speaking to adults, as well as speak in a monotone voice...but that is typically ONLY with adults....thanks


    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:08 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I don't know. Some of his intellectual traits sound a bit like Asperger's but with his social abilities and all, I'm just not sure that's it. It doesn't sound like he was delayed in any developmental areas, due to advances in mental areas and I think that's key in some ways. I have an adult son who has lots of things that make us think Asperger's but by the time we heard of it he was so old, it was pretty much too late to benefit from it.
    Maybe not all Asperger's kids have those delays but I thought that was part of it.

    Answer by callmeann at 1:13 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • Feel free to PM me if you have any more questions.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 1:13 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • AS far as eye contact goes... for my son his is considered 'adequate' he will not make eye contact if he is uncomfortable like with strangers, when he is in trouble or when he is nervous. He will look down or past you head.

    Answer by But_Mommie at 1:21 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • Actually, it is not uncommon for asperger's children to talk early. They also often have a high level of vocabulary than most children their age.
    We actually thought the now 20 year old was ADHD, it wasn't until his younger brother was diagnosed with autism, that we realize what his problem was--and we were right. He too, has many friends, but doesn't get jokes and has no heightened sensitivities. He is now in the Navy and does very well. He did get Academic Support in school, but it was mainly to help keep him organized.

    Answer by layh41407 at 1:33 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • all children on the spectum display different things even with the same son has asperger's, adhd, anxiety in very high levels at school , but doesnt have more than one friend, doesnt understand jokes, and is a very literal thinker (there are no gray areas) honestly have to parent these kids at thier individual level.....

    Answer by cara124 at 9:32 AM on Nov. 28, 2010