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2 Bumps

My sister -in law of my late hubby has overstepped her boundrys

The last 3 years, my sister -inlaw has taken over my time with my marine sons, she makes more money and gives them things I cant. Do I confront her and state I only see my kids once or twice a year and they is stepping in and being disrespectful. or just let it go.

 
scottie45

Asked by scottie45 at 4:44 PM on Nov. 27, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 4 (39 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • well her giving them money is one thing but taking the time to spend with you is another... they are your sons and i think you should talk to them about it too along with your sister in law.
    Lynnsae

    Answer by Lynnsae at 4:47 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • Can't you share your children. Let her love them too. You are their mother and they know that, but they can love their aunt too.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 4:47 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I think she's being a caring aunt.
    Simplicity3

    Answer by Simplicity3 at 4:46 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • Talk to your sons not her. Try not to get angry when you speak to them, let them know you love them and miss them.

    RyansMom001

    Answer by RyansMom001 at 4:47 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I would definitely address it with your sis in law and let her know it does bother you. Maybe she does not realize that she is doing anything wrong. I would bring it up to her and just say "it makes me feel uncomfortable that you spend a lot of time with my sons and spend a lot of money on them. I would like to enjoy more time with them as well." Hope this helps!
    Mindy8210

    Answer by Mindy8210 at 4:48 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • If it is really bothering you, then speak up. Kindly let her know how you feel. But make sure it not going to hurt your kids. Just remember, though, there are no rewards for being a doormat.
    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 4:51 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • P.S. The time thing would bother me something awful.
    CarriePM

    Answer by CarriePM at 4:52 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • You said "my marine sons". This means that they are adults, and make their own choices about who they spend their time with. The problem doesn't lie with her. She loves her nephews and is doing things for them. She hasn't overstepped boundaries and she isn't being disrespectful. If your sons choose to spend their time with her, that is their choice. If it's a problem for you, you should speak with your sons. Tell THEM how you feel.
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 4:52 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • If you think your children can be bought out from under you, you have more problems than you know.

    Your children need your unconditional love --even if you can only see them a couple of times a year. If they have it, they won't be swayed by anything.

    Make sure you're not doing what my mil does, though: she pleads 'poor mouse' all the time, but it's perfectly clear from the way she lives her life that the reason she can't afford to see her only child, or her only 2 grandchildren, is because what she does what she wants with her money (and she does a lot of it) is clearly all for her. She has no housing expenses (paid for her house years ago) travels, gambles, replaces her furniture regularly --and somehow can't manage to buy a single plane ticket.

    My sister, otoh, makes a lot less and somehow manages to pay a mortgage and buys tickets for 4 to visit our family annually --from the same area. Magical.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 4:52 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

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