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2 Bumps

Help to change and adapt.

Why can't we as women Help change the child support laws instead of helping to keep them the way they are? They are wrong! It is set up for women to just collect a paycheck basically. You all need to stop! (maybe not everyone)
I get CS but my child's father lives in a different state and voluntary left. But what about all those great dads out there that live by their kids and want to be around. The one's who want their kids as much as possible but the women won't let them just so they can have some sort of control and collect their paychecks.
These dad's out there want to be able to buy their kids things and take them places too. But they can't because they have to give all their money to you so you can be the parent and the dad's can just be visitors. How sad.
What if he looses his job or is going through a ruff time, the cs just keeps adding up, it's doesn't stop. That is not real life, the mother won't go to jail for not making enough money for her kids, no one will know and no one cares it's only dads that suffer.
I understand if you want your ex to suffer I get it but it is hurting all those other good dad's out their not just your ex.
The women that really need help,the one's who deserve full custody should get it but there are a lot of details in the CS laws that need to be changed and it will be changing. California is already trying but it needs a lot more people out there to help and it needs to happen sooner than later.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:02 PM on Nov. 27, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Answers (9)
  • He made the child, he supports the child. End of story. If I lose my job I still have to support my kid. Why doesn't he?

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:03 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • OMG! You don't get!! He has to support the child(en) at his house DUH! If you loose your job no one is going to take you to jail. you just have to live on less for a while. But the CS doesn't stop when he looses his job and he has to still support the kids at his house too.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:11 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I don't like the setup of child support. I think they should pitch in half the cost of everything. I know a friend of mine who didn't make very much money and couldn't wait for the CS to roll in every month so she could get her hair & nails done. Meanwhile she told the kid that he couldn't play football because she didn't have the $$. She lived rent-free courtesy of her parents, too.

    I hear shared parenting with no CS at all is becoming popular. Maybe this will inspire some parents (not singling out the dads by any means) to stay involved with their kids on a regular basis.

    Answer by cheeseit at 7:12 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • You are barking up the wrong tree with me. I got $200 a month for my CS. It paid for diapers when he was little. I had sole custody, including being 100% responsible for any medical insurance and medical costs. I was married to my ex- for 6 years before our LO was born. We went through fertility treatments and miscarriages. Then he "doesn't want to be a father"?????? Makes no sense. He "worked under the table" and cried poverty. He remarried and lives in a big house and has 3 cars between them. I lived with my parents. I never tried to get our support raised because who needed him?????? NEVER ONCE did he send ds a birthday card or gift or Christmas or anything. DO NOT talk to me about CS.

    Answer by kjrn79 at 7:17 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I said::

    The women that really need help,the one's who deserve full custody should get it but there are a lot of details in the CS laws that need to be changed

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:37 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I think the child support laws in Texas are just fine.

    Answer by bhoward87 at 8:24 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • I lived with supposed shared custody for 2 years after the divorce. it was supposed to be actual joint custody with a 6 month split. He even told the judge he would move into the same county so they could stay in the same school. When it came time for his 6 months, he always had a reason why he couldnt get them; hell, half the time he didnt get them for his weekends. So after two years of this, I figured, I didnt make them alone, why am I supporting them alone? I took him back to court and got full custody with CS ordered. He almost NEVER paid meanwhile buying brand new Harleys and taking trips to New Mexico.
    Two years of that and the state took him to court (I was on welfare). Over $10000 behind. He bonded out and paid for about 6 months and I havent seen any since. He is back to felony level non-payment.
    There are women who use their kids and CS against a dad who is trying and they make the rest of us look bad.

    Answer by tat2dprincess at 11:53 PM on Nov. 27, 2010

  • My ex and i have no court ordered child support, he lives one mile from us. He has our daughter on Tuesdays, Thursdays( from 3-7pm) and has her one night on the weekends . He spends time with her on every holiday . He also , without fail , without question, gives me child support every single month. There have been occasions were he was struggling and if that happens he just explains his situation and either we skip that month or he gives us what he can( this has not happened in a long time) I realise we do not have a typical situation , but I'm grateful for it. our common interest is truly our child. We are equally responsible for her health , happiness and well being.


    Answer by sulkygirl79 at 11:07 AM on Nov. 28, 2010

  • I raised and payed for 3 children with no support because after 14 yrs of marriage, he decided to quit his job, work under the table and crawl to the bottom of a Jack Daniels bottle. I have lived both sides of this coin. My current DH has a 15 yr old lives with mom and step dad in 400,000 dollar house with pool and her own everything, and he pays over 200 dollars a month for her. He has her every other weekend, but now she is getting older and only comes when she hasn't anything better to do. Yet he still pays for her. If there weren't so many dead beat parents, the ones like my DH wouldn't have to suffer...nor would the kids like it's their fault their dad is a bastard!

    Answer by salexander at 12:56 PM on Nov. 29, 2010

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